Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #92 The Chronicles of YoBee

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A Little Grey said:
To me a weak person is one who abuses, a weak person is the one who blames the victim. It takes a great deal of strength to leave an abuser, knowing that when you leave you will pull the pin on the grenade and tit will get a whole lot worse. That’s why it takes so many attempts to leave.

it doesn’t matter whether you are for or against IG, for or against BW but you should never blame or shame a victim. AE has proved beyond doubt with her own words, her own emails and texts, and her own wizard messages that she is an abuser.

Tattle is not exclusively a pro Ioan site, but all of us are decent enough NOT to blame the victim. There are people her that will support IG and BW and people here who will say he did this wrong or that wrong but everyone sees that he is a victim.

it was only a couple of months ago that everyone was blami him for not fighting for the children, then the TRO happened (which will help him with the custody agreement), none of us know what goes on in the background we only have AE’s narrative, and as has been proved by her own statements she lies.
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💯 (y) but BIB really stood out to me as it summed up exactly the difficulty victims face & exactly what happened to Ioan! ❤
 
TheNotoriousManzana said:
I have to say I'm not sure she's being well-cared for.
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it’s evident her emotional needs aren’t being met, but that video really made me realise how poorly she’s being taken care of physically too.

I always try refrain from commenting on the appearance of the girls, I felt unhappy with comments in the past about what Elsie was wearing in a photo as I felt that was kinda problematic, kids wear all kinds of ratty clothes around the house (I didn’t say anything as we all have a right to our views of course). But this recent video is deeply concerning, and I’m surprised Alice has shared it publicly. She looks awful. Even if it’s the school holidays surely you make sure your children at least have clean hair and their skin taken care of (the cold sore looks as though it’s been festering for a while, they clear up pretty fast with cream and as a parent wouldn’t you notice right away?). I fear for them both but Ella is at least old enough to care for her own physical needs if necessary. Elsie is still so young. Really heartbreaking to see.

I have to admit as soon as I saw it I thought it was designed to be a dig at Ioan. Look at the state of your girl. Look how badly she’s doing. And there’s nothing you can do to help her. I wouldn’t put that past Alice. But it’s a dangerous game.
 
cssam said:
I love reading things like this. I too know of plenty of people who've had it for decades and are fortunate enough to be doing well. And to be fair, things have changed a lot over the last 20 years. It is a horrible disease but it is also definitely not the death sentence it once was.

That said, the fact is not even Bianca knows what she's going to be dealing with next week, never mind in 10 or 20 years time. It's why she refers to it as "a question mark". There isn't a neurologist out there who would be able to tell her exactly how her MS will affect her. She can either feel sorry for herself or live every day like it's a gift.

Just a wild guess of course but I would imagine her attitude is one of the things Ioan loves about her.
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I’ve only just realised she had MS. My Dad had that. It’s really unpredictable and there are several different types. You can’t really tell what type people have for a long time either. Most start as relapsing remitting type where people have episodes in between which they can lead a normal life. Some people have it like that forever but some people go on to have progressive MS which means they gradually become iller and iller and more and more disabled which happened with my Dadwho passed away from related complications last year.

Fingers crossed Bianca has the latter. On the plus side there is often much to admire in MS sufferers who often face a huge amount of difficulty and uncertainty with bravery and stoicism. I think you’re right about that being something IG loves about her.
 
GingerJones50 said:
I’ve only just realised she had MS. My Dad had that. It’s really unpredictable and there are several different types. You can’t really tell what type people have for a long time either. Most start as relapsing remitting type where people have episodes in between which they can lead a normal life. Some people have it like that forever but some people go on to have progressive MS which means they gradually become iller and iller and more and more disabled which happened with my Dadwho passed away from related complications last year.

Fingers crossed Bianca has the latter. On the plus side there is often much to admire in MS sufferers who often face a huge amount of difficulty and uncertainty with bravery and stoicism. I think you’re right about that being something IG loves about her.
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I'm so very sorry for your loss ❤️
 
StoneMountain said:
thank you ❤ 🌹 ❤

I'm not certain I ever found lasting peace and happiness though I did have many experiences of happiness. And I don't feel empty though I am again alone - so that is a form of peace.

Any time I doubted my refusal to him I would weigh in my mind (like the 'court scales of justice') the options of 'love' or 'money'. Only ever took 5 seconds for me to know that love was more important.

A few months after my refusal he married a 4x widower who is now widowed for her 6th(?) time. So after he passed if I had/have my 5 seconds of quick thoughts I still am always glad that I refused as I believe that I mentally would not have survived and money cannot buy my mental health.
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I'm glad you have experienced happiness & wish only good things & good people to come your way. 🥰
I agree about there being a form of peace in being alone. You did the right thing & I totally agree about MH it is priceless.
Look after yourself, ❤😘 xxx
 
SynthGirl said:
Agreed. Actor Sam Neill is 74, I believe. The guy is still handsome, fit, has a farm in New Zealand, a vineyard, still acts, is a fascinating man, with varied interests. Most single women 20 years younger, in their 50s, would be after him. Ioan is vain, keeps himself fit. I don't see any reason to believe he is going to let himself go. I mean, he's not going to be sitting in a recliner, life over.

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I believe an age gap comes down to the individual.

I've always gone for an older man. My first husband was 26 years older than me. It wasn't an issue when I was younger and he was 50. But when he got into his 60s and I was still in my 30s I really felt the age gap. He had always been controlling but it went into over drive as he aged. My now husband is 10 years older than me, is approaching 60 and is fitter than me, at the height of his career and better looking than when he was in his 40s. I don't feel any age difference. My two husbands are chalk and cheese.
 
SynthGirl said:
I see it differently. I feel that everything she had been reading and applying to her own life and her positive direction in life and mentally, after having gone through an abusive marriage, serious back surgery, the long period of time it took for her to go through the initial devastating symptoms of MS and going through treatment after treatment until eventually finding a treatment that worked, is what drew him to her because he was at a desperately low point in his life with a narcissistic, unbalanced, bullying wife and knowing what going through a divorce was going to put him through, the children through, all the while being the breadwinner. He leaned on her when he so desperately needed a soft shoulder to figuratively place his head on,. Bianca was the stronger one. He wasn't the white knight. She was the white knight to him, in a way, as a confidant, someone who he felt had a lot of wisdom regarding adversity, someone he could talk with about everything he was going through. We forget that it was a year before he saw her again, so it was a relationship based on deep communication for that year, not some frivolus relationship. I don't know if they began an affair before he left, but I imagine sometime in 2020 they had begun a friendship, and were attracted to each other. He's been there for her in every way since she moved to LA and had some setbacks healthwise, but she's been there just as much, if not more, for him emotionally since his divorce and child custody issues have become even messier.
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I love this perspective. ❤
I had forgotten it was a year before he saw her again. I've always thought they likely communicated over FT/online like many had to during lockdown & they developed a strong deep emotional connection. 💞
 
Sweettutu said:
Weak in that he didn’t have enough resolve to leave when he was unhappy without a new girlfriend to hold his hand and help him.

Hadn’t realised tattle was exclusively a pro-Ioan site 🙄

IG/AE relationship was evidently fucked up, you do wonder how much of AE behaviour was enabled by IG tho. 20 years smacks of codependency. And interestingly he’s swapped supporting/propping up AE who clearly has her own problems for BW who has MS and who knows what knock on psychological impact from that. I think he has to be emotionally reliant on someone who needs him.
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I noticed that you have rarely dipped your toe in the AE/IG thread which will leave you woefully unprepared to make the comments you’re making. Of course you have a right to but don’t be surprised if you get blowback.
 
IHateHadargoyle said:
I noticed that you have rarely dipped your toe in the AE/IG thread which will leave you woefully unprepared to make the comments you’re making. Of course you have a right to but don’t be surprised if you get blowback.
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Someone hinted at it before that the thread has been going wonky lately …. Hope someone isn’t being silly …. Keep your wits about ya we may have to … ASSEMBLE 😂🤣🙄🤔👨🏽‍🎤🧑🏻‍🎤👩‍🎤
 
ZipSilver said:
it’s evident her emotional needs aren’t being met, but that video really made me realise how poorly she’s being taken care of physically too.

I always try refrain from commenting on the appearance of the girls, I felt unhappy with comments in the past about what Elsie was wearing in a photo as I felt that was kinda problematic, kids wear all kinds of ratty clothes around the house (I didn’t say anything as we all have a right to our views of course). But this recent video is deeply concerning, and I’m surprised Alice has shared it publicly. She looks awful. Even if it’s the school holidays surely you make sure your children at least have clean hair and their skin taken care of (the cold sore looks as though it’s been festering for a while, they clear up pretty fast with cream and as a parent wouldn’t you notice right away?). I fear for them both but Ella is at least old enough to care for her own physical needs if necessary. Elsie is still so young. Really heartbreaking to see.

I have to admit as soon as I saw it I thought it was designed to be a dig at Ioan. Look at the state of your girl. Look how badly she’s doing. And there’s nothing you can do to help her. I wouldn’t put that past Alice. But it’s a dangerous game.
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To be fair, the girls have been poorly and that could probably account for her wan look and when your immune system is under attack things like cold sores make an appearance. Hopefully some sunshine will work wonders on them.
 
GingerJones50 said:
I’ve only just realised she had MS. My Dad had that. It’s really unpredictable and there are several different types. You can’t really tell what type people have for a long time either. Most start as relapsing remitting type where people have episodes in between which they can lead a normal life. Some people have it like that forever but some people go on to have progressive MS which means they gradually become iller and iller and more and more disabled which happened with my Dadwho passed away from related complications last year.

Fingers crossed Bianca has the latter. On the plus side there is often much to admire in MS sufferers who often face a huge amount of difficulty and uncertainty with bravery and stoicism. I think you’re right about that being something IG loves about her.
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I'm so sorry about your dad.

I think that's why it's brilliant that people like Selma Blair (and of course Bianca) are trying to raise awareness because like you said, there are different types, and it's different for everyone. It's a shame that it's still very misunderstood, and it definitely doesn't help that there are ignorant people like Alice saying ridiculous things about it!
 
Reporting for duty, sir!
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