For anybody struggling ❤

1
I an absolutely get the anxiety - it’s unbearable and debilitating at times.
Also I hate to say it out loud but I realise that I’ve come to really dislike Christmas.
I’m hosting. Both days.
I miss my Dad.
I feel like the extent to which I’m dumped on has pushed me to breaking point.
I’m the first to be looked to for the things no one else wants to do.
And the last to be thought of when no one needs anything.
I feel very done with it all right now. Am trying to become a more positive person but I’ve hit a major mental block.
 
Last edited:
mee43 said:
I an absolutely get the anxiety - it’s unbearable and debilitating at times.
Also I hate to say it out loud but I realise that I’ve come to really dislike Christmas.
I’m hosting. Both days.
I miss my Dad.
I feel like the extent to which I’m dumped on has pushed me to breaking point.
I’m the first to be looked to for the things no one else wants to do.
And the last to be thought of when no one needs anything.
I feel very done with it all right now. Am trying to become a more positive person but I’ve hit a major mental block.
Click to expand...
Sending hugs. Christmas is a time when we reflect on families and the support we do or don’t get from them. It seems to shine a light on issues which during the rest of the year are manageable. I have decided 2025 is my year of saying no to family particularly my sister and her kids. Hope the Christmas period is not too bad for you.
 
I find Christmas a struggle too. Multiple reasons.

Today was my birthday which was another difficult day. Remembering how different things were last year and how I took that for granted.

I rely on my work to distract me from difficult feelings and I will have a long break from it and have to face my own thoughts.

I can feel my brain going into silly self destruction mode. Indulging in a tonne of maladaptive day dreaming. On the plus side I'm doing long walks to facilitate the day dreaming. The day dreaming is not good but the exercise is.
 
I can relate to so many of your posts and am so sorry some of you feel this way. Sending love and hoping with each day, things get a little better 💟

I'm feeling it too. I've suffered with anxiety and depression on and off over the years but this past month or so I've really felt it creep up on me again.
I feel like my head is heavy every day. I'm overthinking, creating scenarios, overanalyzing things and situations, friendships, etc.
I feel quite alone, too, because it's such a busy time of year for everyone. I don't want to be a burden to anyone, nor do I want to be doom and gloom.
I feel a bit pathetic with how my thoughts are atm too, it wouldn't normally be me but I've had a close friend cancel quite a bit on plans lately and it's hard to not take it personally when you are already an anxious overthinker and I can't help but feel like a bit of an afterthought or left out.
I know that I'm probably just overthinking that as I know she has said she has felt a bit overwhelmed lately with things going on in her life and I know its Christmas and we are all hanging on but my head is not a light switch that I can just turn off and think ''stop thinking this, stop thinking that''

I think I'm just going to treat today as a new day - stop obsessing over things I can't change and just try to let it be. I don't know how I'm doing that but I'm going to try.
 
Fellas asked for a bit of space, as he's just too overwhelmed he said he'd see me over Christmas just not on Christmas I'm really upset just due to the fact I don't find Christmas the easiest anyway my friends are helping me through and the plan was for me and my partner to go there my friends on nye now said he dosent want my fella there which understandable now stuck in a unwanted position
 
I am pregnant which is wonderful but I’m really struggling with feeling weepy and anxious about visiting relatives for a week (distances make a shorter stay impossible). I also realised, which alarms me a bit, that usually I’d have a Xmas drink now and again to make it easier to deal with. But of course this time I can’t and won’t. But it did help with the anxiety in small amounts!
 
I think Chistmas amplifies everything.

I was meant to be having a break. A break from single parenting neurodivergent children and I was really looking forward to it

It's not happening and that's one disappointment but it's the constant control by my ex that's the problem.

I go nowhere. I haven't seen friends for ages (years). They can't really come here because the kids don't cope. This man thinks the 15 mins he drives one of his children to school is spending quality time with him.

I really needed a break. I'm annoyed about the wasted money too but I need a break.

I'm either at home or at work and then he said he couldn't spend a couple of hours with one of his children because he really needed to balance time with the children with time for himself 🤯. You live alone in a bedsit (despite earning 60k). You have every night to yourself you massive twit.

I can't wait for my time off work but actually I know that's going to be a problem because once I fall out of routine, I might fall apart a bit.

I'm so cross with myself for getting involved with someone like him. He's just an awful person and I don't feel like I'll ever be free.
 
TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo said:
I'm so cross with myself for getting involved with someone like him. He's just an awful person and I don't feel like I'll ever be free.
Click to expand...

It’s not yourself; the world is full of lovely people who’ve been involved with bastards. He sounds awful and you’re a hero. What bits of your routine could you keep up? And please keep venting here.
---
Wobblehead said:
If he wants a roast he can cook it would be my response. Dont feel pressured
Click to expand...
Massively second this. If you do end up cooking it and can afford it, get as many ready-prepared/easily-prepared elements as possible, and get lots of lovely unchristmassy books/media/podcasts lined up for when it’s over.
 
It’s The Truman Show said:
Thank you for the thread. Life is tough. Life is complex. So many tricky situations to negotiate.
I have decided to seek help for emotional eating and compulsive shopping / spending and hope to start some therapy soon ! I have childhood based emotional issues I think. I’m ok and fortunately I’m working a LOAD of extra hours to afford my spending but I am embarrassed by my spending actually.
Click to expand...
This is me. I worked hard this year to get my addiction to sugar, overeating under control. The overspending I am working on. I’m in my 50’s and it’s f ed o exhausting.
---
mee43 said:
I an absolutely get the anxiety - it’s unbearable and debilitating at times.
Also I hate to say it out loud but I realise that I’ve come to really dislike Christmas.
I’m hosting. Both days.
I miss my Dad.
I feel like the extent to which I’m dumped on has pushed me to breaking point.
I’m the first to be looked to for the things no one else wants to do.
And the last to be thought of when no one needs anything.
I feel very done with it all right now. Am trying to become a more positive person but I’ve hit a major mental block.
Click to expand...
You’re not alone, we are all here for you ❤️❤️
 
Bananabadger said:
It’s not yourself; the world is full of lovely people who’ve been involved with bastards. He sounds awful and you’re a hero. What bits of your routine could you keep up? And please keep venting here.
Click to expand...
So, I'm thinking I could tidy and sort out all the things I haven't had chance to. Maybe just a bit every day.

The difficulty is in wanting to just curl up into a ball and not do anything (other than day to day stuff like keeping the children alive). I think I'm a bit overwhelmed but I'm also aware that I'm quite a functional stressed person if that makes sense? I just do it on auto pilot. That's why just stopping is weird.

I also feel bad because people are in far worse situations that me so I should stop being such an ungrateful person.
 
TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo said:
So, I'm thinking I could tidy and sort out all the things I haven't had chance to. Maybe just a bit every day.

The difficulty is in wanting to just curl up into a ball and not do anything (other than day to day stuff like keeping the children alive). I think I'm a bit overwhelmed but I'm also aware that I'm quite a functional stressed person if that makes sense? I just do it on auto pilot. That's why just stopping is weird.

I also feel bad because people are in far worse situations that me so I should stop being such an ungrateful person.
Click to expand...

You were in a relationship with someone who was abusive to you. You have children with additional and complex needs. You are smashing it lass, even if you feel you aren’t.
 
I just feel so sad this evening. Just done a shift at work. I’m exhausted and a bit emotional. I wish I didn’t have to work tomorrow but I don’t want to let the team down. 😢

I just feel so let down. I feel so hurt. I’m trying to ‘do’ Christmas but all I want to do is sleep and never wake up. It’s hard to be festive at the moment.

Why do people cut you off? Block you or mute you? I feel I must be a bad person. It’s sending me insane and I’m overthinking massively. I have anxiety and OCD.

Nothing in my life is ever permanent. Friendships, relationships even family. I’m always second best, I’m always the one people use when there is nothing better.

I keep getting intrusive thoughts that I’d be better not being here. I’m OK but it washes over me sometimes. I feel sad at how life has turned out and feel a bit helpless.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top