For anybody struggling ❤

1
I don't really know how to word this because my head is just a massive scramble at the moment. It's been a while since I felt this anxious.

Over the weekend I had a bit of a falling out with a friend because we had arranged a day to meet up which she said we hadn't agreed on. That got my back up because if it was the other way around and I'd got the day wrong, I'd have been the worst person in the world. Anyway, it wasn't a massive deal but I just couldn't help but think if it was one of her other friends she would have somehow found the time and no plans would have changed. Just made me sort of question my worth a little bit. I just feel like I'm being paranoid, overthinking, and probably just a bit emotional therefore making mountains out of molehills.

I am under quite a bit of stress as we have our wedding in a couple of months. Another issue then thrown into the mix trying to chase people to RSVP as we need our final numbers at the end of the month. People just ignored my message asking as politely as I could if they could let me know and I understood it was a busy time.

I think its just all making me feel a bit insecure in myself as a person and if I'm not worthy enough or good enough.
I wish I could be one of these people who honesly didn't give a toss but that just isn't me. I know this is such a busy time of year, and people are busy, have stuff on and I'm not the only person stressed out atm but how do I stop myself from having these stupid thoughts that I'm the issue, that they don't like me, that I'm a burden. I know that sounds pathetic. But when I have these anxious moments those are the thoughts I can't shake :(
I've suffered badly with anxiety in the past, I need to remind myself my thoughts are not facts and I'm only creating these scenarios in my head then upsetting myself but it is easier said than done.
How do you get yourself to stop overthinking?

I don't really think I can talk to anyone about how I'm feeling either.
 
Tinkerbell cat said:
I don't really know how to word this because my head is just a massive scramble at the moment. It's been a while since I felt this anxious.

Over the weekend I had a bit of a falling out with a friend because we had arranged a day to meet up which she said we hadn't agreed on. That got my back up because if it was the other way around and I'd got the day wrong, I'd have been the worst person in the world. Anyway, it wasn't a massive deal but I just couldn't help but think if it was one of her other friends she would have somehow found the time and no plans would have changed. Just made me sort of question my worth a little bit. I just feel like I'm being paranoid, overthinking, and probably just a bit emotional therefore making mountains out of molehills.

I am under quite a bit of stress as we have our wedding in a couple of months. Another issue then thrown into the mix trying to chase people to RSVP as we need our final numbers at the end of the month. People just ignored my message asking as politely as I could if they could let me know and I understood it was a busy time.

I think its just all making me feel a bit insecure in myself as a person and if I'm not worthy enough or good enough.
I wish I could be one of these people who honesly didn't give a toss but that just isn't me. I know this is such a busy time of year, and people are busy, have stuff on and I'm not the only person stressed out atm but how do I stop myself from having these stupid thoughts that I'm the issue, that they don't like me, that I'm a burden. I know that sounds pathetic. But when I have these anxious moments those are the thoughts I can't shake :(
I've suffered badly with anxiety in the past, I need to remind myself my thoughts are not facts and I'm only creating these scenarios in my head then upsetting myself but it is easier said than done.
How do you get yourself to stop overthinking?

I don't really think I can talk to anyone about how I'm feeling either.
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I dont have any helpful advice unfortunately but just wanted to comment. Friendships are really hard at times. Ive just been through something similar. The wedding thing resonates with me too. It pissed me right off that people couldnt be arsed to send back the rsvp when i had paid for return postage and envelope etc. so i put a date on it and if they hadnt responded they were disinvited. duck ppl honestly. They are the problem, not u. 🤍
 
Sheila Bloom said:
I dont have any helpful advice unfortunately but just wanted to comment. Friendships are really hard at times. Ive just been through something similar. The wedding thing resonates with me too. It pissed me right off that people couldnt be arsed to send back the rsvp when i had paid for return postage and envelope etc. so i put a date on it and if they hadnt responded they were disinvited. duck ppl honestly. They are the problem, not u. 🤍
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Thank you for replying. They are hard at times, and I do understand that I'm making things worse by letting my thoughts consume how I'm feeling. Tomorrow is a new days and hopefully with that comes feeling less how I am.
This is the mindset I'm in now with regards to the wedding, the people who haven't got back to me tbh won't really be that missed so it's no huge loss but it is just more the fact 75 other people could let me know and this small number of people couldn't. I have QR codes on the invites to make it so simple. As far as avoiding your message because they can't be arsed responding to just simply let you know.. I just don't get it but as you say duck them and at the end of December I will get great pleasure in telling them they are uninvited 💟
 
I've been down for a while now. Struggling to message people back. Love life is tit. work is tit. Home life is alright- I live with a housemate but I'd rather be on my own with how i want to decorate it. And I'm single, no kids but I've been so broody recently. And it coming upto Christmas soon and seeing how busy everyone is, it's just even more annoying!!!!

but I'm struggling today
 
qqwertyy said:
Argh I feel so flat and disconnected at the moment. I feel like I could find my dream partner, live in a mansion, win the lottery and still feel nothing. I cannot feel like this for another 40+ years and I have no idea what’s wrong or how to fix it 😩
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I get you. I wish I knew how to advise you to get over it but I’m the same.
Sadly I focus on the one thing that’s missing in my life which is a happy relationship and forget about everything else I’ve achieved. Wish I wasn’t like that.
 
Oh god I’m so guilty of that too and I hate it. It’s so hard to get out of that mindset isn’t it. And I KNOW a relationship wouldn’t really solve anything, but that’s even more worrying in a way. I’m so desperate to get out of this funk.
 
I think it’s natural to focus on the one thing you don’t have. For me, my TTC struggles are the thing I am really focussed on. I’m lucky to have everything else I could possibly want in life, except a baby, and it overpowers all the rest of the things I have and becomes something I hyper focus on.
 
I'm really struggling tonight. I can't stop sobbing. Old traumas are coming up for me, I'd had EMDR therapy years ago which worked but for some reason it's all come flooding back tonight and I'm just so emotional. Not sure what has triggered it either. Although this time of year is always tough. Just needed to write this somewhere as I don't have many people I can talk to. I hope everyone on this thread is doing okay, I know this time of year is hard for so many people but you always have us on this thread to talk to should you need it ❤️ take care of yourselves during this time, sending lots of love to you all x
 
justonemorepage said:
I'm really struggling tonight. I can't stop sobbing. Old traumas are coming up for me, I'd had EMDR therapy years ago which worked but for some reason it's all come flooding back tonight and I'm just so emotional. Not sure what has triggered it either. Although this time of year is always tough. Just needed to write this somewhere as I don't have many people I can talk to. I hope everyone on this thread is doing okay, I know this time of year is hard for so many people but you always have us on this thread to talk to should you need it ❤ take care of yourselves during this time, sending lots of love to you all x
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Sending love to you too - hope you are feeling a tiny bit better this morning
 
justonemorepage said:
I'm really struggling tonight. I can't stop sobbing. Old traumas are coming up for me, I'd had EMDR therapy years ago which worked but for some reason it's all come flooding back tonight and I'm just so emotional. Not sure what has triggered it either. Although this time of year is always tough. Just needed to write this somewhere as I don't have many people I can talk to. I hope everyone on this thread is doing okay, I know this time of year is hard for so many people but you always have us on this thread to talk to should you need it ❤️ take care of yourselves during this time, sending lots of love to you all x
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Hoping today is a better one for you.
It is such a difficult time of year, as you say.
Memories flood back, the absence of lost loved ones is felt even more than ever.
I feel consumed by fear of what the future holds, too - don’t know if anyone else gets like this?

I hope that the crying was a bit cathartic and provided some release for you x
 
Had a family wedding yesterday, I don't particularly like family events anyway but because im a naturally shy and quiet person and not a loud show off like the rest of them nobody really bothers to include me (or my husband)
If it wasn’t for my mum her cousin and my uncle we literally wouldn't have had anyone to speak to
I hate how these things make me feel anyway but seeing them all there showing off about how amazing their life's are (I know in reality there not perfect) after we have had a bit of a tit time has just made me feel weird today if I've not been crying I've been raging over the stupidest things, to be honest I just want to hide away from life right now the thought of having to get up and going to work tomorrow just makes it all worse 😭
 
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