Emma Drew #22 I don’t know why I'm accused of neglect, I arranged a click and collect

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I’ve said it before and will say it again, the concern about his finances being investigated for his care smacks of guilt and panic to me. I think she’s been using him in some kind of financial entanglement for her benefit. Maybe she’s got some kind of investment in his name and got a pot of money she’s now trying to hide so it doesn’t get taken to pay for his care!
 
I can assure you, the SW assessment has not been completed... She is lying through her tic tac teeth.
She rang a few weeks ago. Given the current state of Norfolk Social Care, I assure you he has not jumped to the front of the needs list.

Yes he has care and support needs but someone who doesn’t work and is his ‘career’ is or SHOULD BE meeting all his care and support needs.

The chances of him getting a service are very very very very slim.
 
Whatthecatsaid said:
I know someone who lives with her elderly parent who needs full time care. She should really be in a care home with professionals but because the house would have to be sold to pay for that cost wise, they have opted to keep her at home, they pay for some care and do the rest themselves. It’s the relative’s house and for her to go into care they’d take into account her assess towards cost. They’d basically loose their inheritance because she will probably live for another good few years with good care but that’s not cheap in a care home.
I have to wonder if that’s why they have not been getting official organisations involved, because they know his house would be assessed for payment of care if he needs residential care and they’d loose anything they thought they might inherit.
I could be wrong though...
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I don't know too much about this but out of interest if they and the family want to keep them at home, is this allowed? Do official people need to be involved?
 
In America there's guardianships where if tricked into signing them they can force you out of your home, steal you from family without permission, sell your property and everything you own - all legal and above board and supported by the police (though the initial tricking of people into letting you become their guardian is pure evil - though obviously not everyone is that bad) If you can, check out Dirty Money on Netflix - the guardianship episode. It's absolutely evil what some people will do.

Here you have 'more' of a say if you have power of attorney for health/welfare and property/finances (they are two different types and you have to apply for each whilst the person who needs it has capacity otherwise it's too late. You can't fake it either as it has to be signed by a doctor/professional people and there's generally people you write to to let them know you're applying for it and they can register their concerns if there are any about you being that persons attorney. If you skip that part you have to have two professional people who know you and have known you for a while in their capacity as a professional person (lawyer, doctor, nurse etc) sign that you are making this decision in sound mind etc and that they know the people who are trying to become that persons attorney.

Usually it becomes obvious that the person isn't managing at home, even with support and that they need 24 hour care (ours came when grandad lost the use of his legs and we couldn't safely or reasonably get a wheelchair in his house as it was a long passage way with the stairs ahead as you came ithe front door and the front/middle room straight off said passageway and it was too tight a turn to get through the door.

As Social Observation said, there would be a best interests meeting to see if extra carers in place would help, or night visits (useless as they were as here it was only one visit during the night three nights a week and all she did was pop her head in, see him sleeping, write it down and feck off - once leaving the front door unlocked.) This means that agencies involved in his care - and you (make sure you'd push yourself forward to be included as you had power of attorney - this carries more weight than not having it. Without it your wishes are heard as NOK but ignored if the council/social workers/hospital decide that he can no longer stay at home safely.

With said POA you/the person cared for can be overruled - especially if he they need a deprivationation of liberty or DoLs though this is usually in place in a hospital or care home (this is a formal document carried out by social services with medical and carers support to say that sadly this person no longer understands consequences or how to keep themselves safe and sound and that they have to be kept safe in a place designed for continuous observation - essentially you're taking their freedom away for their own safety.) It has to be renewed each year and fully checked each year.

It all depends on if the care being provided is enough and is safe enough for the person to be supported fully at home. Unfortunately a lot of Dementia suffering people do become violent and it becomes unsafe for them and the person caring for them.

If you don't own your own home and you have to be moved into a care home - social services will pay a percentage of the home fees and you use your pension to pay the rest. In the case of my grandad for the first 4ish years, he received something like 170 per week pension and the care home took 150 of it. If you stay at home and require care you are means tested and may have to pay a percentage towards it.

If you own your own home you will have to fund your own care at home or in a care home. This could be through savings or selling your home. Once your finances run out you can be means tested again and social services will do what they do for those who don't own their own home as mentioned above.

You do have to be fully open and financially checked every year through social services who will go through everything so you MUST keep all reciepts for the persons purchases and care fees etc.

There is help via NHS Continuing Healthcare (this can also fund home care too) where the NHS will pay for your care. This is for VERY ill people who need high levels of care and is very hard to get. We did get it for Grandad but this was because of other care needs too not just his dementia. It's worth an application but it can be like pulling teeth. The first time we applied he didn't qualify but he did the second for the last 4ish years of him being in the care home when he became violent again and fully lost his capacity and obtained the DoLS as well.

My advice to you, Emma and EVERYONE in this position is to have a lined a4 notebook and use it like a diary. Write down EVERYTHING EVERY DAY and tell people who come to the house to write things down too - messages, if he had a wash, if he took his medicine, what he said if anything was asked for, what phonecalls/visitors to the house said, if he did anything out of the ordinary, if he's running out of something, if someone called/something is worrying etc. When we got this in action it was fabulous! We had back up proof of everything and timings (also helped when we had a bent social worker too to prove what she was doing). It meant it was all there in black and white by everyone involved in his care. It also meant that we knew everyone was up to date on him and his routine incase we were ever poorly or if we had an appointment coming up for him - they knew what was said as well as us so everyone was constantly looking out for important things. It REALLY made our job so much easier when we could see patterns or had evidence or reminders of what happened months previously.
 
justherefortheattachments said:
I don't know too much about this but out of interest if they and the family want to keep them at home, is this allowed? Do official people need to be involved?
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Only if the person was in danger, I guess they’d have to apply for permission to put the person in a home and put a charge on the property but I think that’s pretty hard to do if the person owns their own home.

Also even if you have POA you now can’t sell someone’s home without their consent unless you can medical prove they are incapable of making the decision. You used to be able to.
 
Whenever Emma talks about money it makes me think of Tony's tweet. All he wants is to spoil his princess but does his princess spoil him?

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Emma is a petulant child, playing dress up and thinking that buying high end brands will make her look good. Unfortunately a pig in lipstick is still a pig. This isn’t an insult of her looks, but her greedy gluttonous personality and it is there for all to see. Imagine spending so constant.

I used to work with a girl who put thousands on credit cards (and used tactics to transfer pay them off etc) all because she was so miserable and thought a ted baker bag/dress or having constant deliveries would make her happy.

Whoever said on here that she has possibly fraudulently used her dads finances OR applied or loans or something business related is so spot on.
 
Did she use her dad’s name and details for Matched Betting?

You set up accounts with bookies and they all have to have be legit sign ups, you even have to give ID sometimes.
But if you get gubbed (kicked off) the bookies, which does happen with Matched Betting, you could sign up with someone else’s details? You can’t sign up with yours again.

Relatively easily done if it was someone close you who gave you permission, and their bank account details etc?

ETA: I learned about matched betting years ago, my intel might be out of date. Might be barking up the wrong tree entirely.
 
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Socialobservation said:
Emma is a petulant child, playing dress up and thinking that buying high end brands will make her look good. Unfortunately a pig in lipstick is still a pig. This isn’t an insult of her looks, but her greedy gluttonous personality and it is there for all to see. Imagine spending so constant.

I used to work with a girl who put thousands on credit cards (and used tactics to transfer pay them off etc) all because she was so miserable and thought a ted baker bag/dress or having constant deliveries would make her happy.

Whoever said on here that she has possibly fraudulently used her dads finances OR applied or loans or something business related is so spot on.
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I agree with this, there’s no way her blogging funds her spending habits, it just doesn’t add up. She literally spends money every day, and lots of it. She needs to find joy in something else, I get joy from seeing my savings grow because I’m weird 😂. Yeah I’ve been on that bloody app a bit too much this month but it’s not often I have splurges unless I need something. She sees something and it could literally be a piece of cat poo for sale and she buys it without a single thought. All the things I like sit in a list on my phone for months before I get the balls to buy it 🤣
 
It definitely looks like she’s has access to her dads money for years, it all adds up. I’ve questions several times how she can spend like she does and using her dads money would definitely answer those questions. She’s in panic mode now because it’s about to all come crashing down

he’s going to need to be assessed and have his finances looked into, if not bu social services then certainly by family members who may also have an interest and who have probably been fobbed off for years.

Karma’s a witch isn’t it Emma
 
Anotherct said:
I agree with this, there’s no way her blogging funds her spending habits, it just doesn’t add up. She literally spends money every day, and lots of it. She needs to find joy in something else, I get joy from seeing my savings grow because I’m weird 😂. Yeah I’ve been on that bloody app a bit too much this month but it’s not often I have splurges unless I need something. She sees something and it could literally be a piece of cat poo for sale and she buys it without a single thought. All the things I like sit in a list on my phone for months before I get the balls to buy it 🤣
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I'm the same in that I'll put things in online baskets online, not buy straight away, and then half the time I'll either go off the item and change my mind or more likely I'll forget about it! 😂 Emma needs to be more like that, take her time and make more considered purchases. I mean how many cat print dresses does one person need? The answer is none...😂 (PS, the lives this afternoon should be fun!)

I'm in agreement with all those who are disgusted that she's still taking things from her Dads house to sell especially when he isn't in sound mind to really know what he's agreeing to. I really hope the money goes to him for either some new clothes and/or some care.

All these visits all of a sudden?? He won't have just suddenly declined so fast in the last week or so surely? Which begs the question, just who on Earth was taking care of him before? Was the poor old guy literally just left to his own devices?

Yes I did feel sorry for her the other day and I still do to a certain extent, but Emma has this great knack of quickly shaking you out of it again and once again normal service is resumed and she's back to annoying the F out of me 🙄😂
 
Whilst it is of course awful to see someone you love deteriorate, emma is in a very privileged position here. She doesn’t work, well properly and any work she does do she can do from anywhere. She boasts about her financial situation and spends like her life depends on it. There are carers who juggle full time work, those who get laid off due to their caring responsibilities and have to depend on carers allowance to get them by or live miles away so face a massive commute to see there family member that needs care. She has none of those worries. And yet, her priority is herself as usual. If my dad was in Ill health, I didn’t work, had money to throw at the situation and I could be there in a short time, I’d be going out of my way to be there for him. She is a selfish cow, end of!
 
DJ* said:
I'm the same in that I'll put things in online baskets online, not buy straight away, and then half the time I'll either go off the item and change my mind or more likely I'll forget about it! 😂 Emma needs to be more like that, take her time and make more considered purchases. I mean how many cat print dresses does one person need? The answer is none...😂 (PS, the lives this afternoon should be fun!)
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When she first started asking for help with her emotional spending I sent her a really long message with lots of tips in that I’ve used over the years. One strategy being just to put things in your basket but not check out. You get the excitement of finding things you like but it doesn’t cost you anything and then if in a week or so you still like it you can check out then. I got a really curt “thanks” back and that was it, no attempt to even apply any strategies. The next day she made loads of purchases and spent an absolute fortune....and it all ended up getting returned. Don’t cry out with a problem and ask for advice then completely ignore the solutions just so you can keep whinging - it’s one of my biggest pet hates in people!
 
JulieScoobyDoo said:
It definitely looks like she’s has access to her dads money for years, it all adds up. I’ve questions several times how she can spend like she does and using her dads money would definitely answer those questions. She’s in panic mode now because it’s about to all come crashing down

he’s going to need to be assessed and have his finances looked into, if not bu social services then certainly by family members who may also have an interest and who have probably been fobbed off for years.

Karma’s a witch isn’t it Emma
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Considering that she announced to all and sundry on Instagram that she has opened an ISA in Tony's name without his consent, it really wouldn't surprise me if she's been doing something dodgy with her dad's finances. 😔
 
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