jack monroe

Thread title by a squig, nominated by @SouthendRealEstate. You each win a can of anti-termite spray, unfortunately the equivalent for guest would be integrity and we can't bottle that. Recap: While we waited to see if a rumoured Christmas chaos will materialise we reminisced about such past...

Thread title by @SweetTransvestite, nominated by @YerDa. You each win a multipack of Wispas to eat while you look at old posters of Big Dave from his Wham! days. Recap: We had some excellent tea when @mchops met Big Dave's old senior colleague in the Fire Service. He was good at his job but not...

Thread title by @GladysMcHaggis nominated by @Powershower - congratulations, you win dinner for two at Big Dave's new museum cafe! Jack's still in hiding, the canal continues to flow merrily onwards without her.

Thread title nominated by @Mrs Peel I don't have a recap so this will have to do instead. Go well my fellow and kumbaya.

Thread title nominated by @I'm not actually here from a squig on Jack's timeline. You, and the squig, each win a fire safety assessment of your home and the first thing they'll tell you is "don't pour liquid into the air fryer" Recap: Much was made, both by the canal and squigs on Xwitter, of...

Thread title by @Clarends, nominated by @Lazarus. You each win a printed-out copy of guest's slow cooker recipes stapled together. You don't get the actual slow cooker because she's donated it to a food bank :( Recap: While we all thought guest was sitting on her Mediterranean, she was actually...

Title by @Livia Fantasy, nominated by @MooBelle (slightly modified as emojis were not showing up properly) You each win a plate of guest's space curry followed by a spite meringue. Recap: Guest still being vewy vewy quiet on her socials, some have speculated on whether she might be back in...

Title by @RandomFishOils, nominated by @FourSeasonSoupObsessive You each win one bongo, one guinea pig (but no accessories), a disembodied penis, and a packet of Jus-Rol. Wiki, as always, is up there on the pink button. Recap: Guest is STILL quiet but we know she's out there, she appears to...

Title by @nothanksbabes, nominated by @Bootsy Sloppins You each win the opportunity to retroactively go halvsies with guest on one of her expensively beige Cotswold sideboards. Wiki is up there on the pink button for newbies. Recap: Guest is still being quiet so we mithered about many things...

New thread! Title by @SouthendRealEstate nommed by @Lazarus You both win a pasta dish of your choice from guest. Jack is being very quiet. Some might say too quiet. So we’re just mithering over her greatest hits. Or misses. Noobs - wiki up there in the pink button * Mod edit * Please keep...

Winning threat title (I think?) by @Foxvint and nominated by @rage naan. You both win a Vienetta, you can use it for Twitter engagement or simply just mither over just how much smaller they are than they used to be. Jack is still MIA aside from some possible 🧦 action over on Twittex or...

Thread title is @griftalo's words slightly modified and nominated by @Five hundred dogs you both win a full colour portrait tattoo of guest, redeemable at Stevie Wonder's Tat Shack. In the previous thread: guest is still AWOL, the canal continues to mither in her absence. When nominating...

Welcome to thread 540! Congratulations on the thread title go to @FrumpyCat for the words and @Valiofthedolls for the nomination. You each win a book token, yay. But it’s for one of Jack’s books. Choose wisely. I think Jack remained quiet over the last thread so we mithered over old things...

Thread title by @WoolyMammoth nominated by both @HotesTilaire and @plentyofpepper you all get to enter your butch phase with 5kg of plaid shirts. In the last thread, Jack made her long-awaited return to Twitter to lap up some praise for her Greenbelt appearance which meant we were treated to...

Thread title is by @MaineCoonMama nominated by @TrolleyParton congrats, you both win a breakfast dead dog spite bowl (recipe coming soon). In the previous thread, guest went on a massive Instagram deletion spree, presumably after Adrian had soft and gentle words with her. We also did Jack as...

Thread title by @Livia Fantasy nominated by several frauen. You win some suspicious year-old pickled radishes, I know how much you love them. In the last thread two ninnies braved guest's keynote speech at the Fringe and reported back that she told lots of lies including but not limited to the...

Thanks to @SouthendRealEstate for thread title suggestion. Inspired by interviewer Graham describing Jack as a Foodie 😂 Top honours this thread must go to our two favourite narcissists @BenignNarcissist and @MissNarcissus who went above and beyond ninny duty and went to see guest in the flesh...

Toot toot, it's Friday and new thread time. Jack posted a weird arse photo of herself with a new haircut, Fraus mithered on what she looked like most. They were not people you'd want to be compared to. Jackie is still mostly scampering in the shadows and not really doing much. She has the...

Thread title courtesy of @plentyofpepper who nominated these words from a squig's Downfall parody. You win at least 140 tickets to see guest at the Fringe. In the last thread, George Monbiot replied to a critical squig with less than favourable words. Guest is still radio silent apart from a...

New thread title courtesy of @BeardyBap nominated by @HootieMcBoob. Please can we never again discuss which thread title we’d like as tattoos? It makes new thread title competitions v tricky 🤬 Anyway, I‘m delighted to say you both win Jack’s medium tier Patreon subscriptions! We’ll pay out and...

Courtesy of @rage naan with 54 votes. Not sure if it was a genuine suggestion, but I’m the adult making the new thread so 🤷‍♀️🤪 Tattle on you beautiful bunch of fraus. (fraus initially auto-corrected to ‘fraud’ and I 🦉🍾)

(Amended) title nominated by @Salmonshirt Wiki is the pink button⬆ Recap needed as Jack has been a busy Barbie.

Bing Bong, it's new thread time. Congrats to @Seaford Haggington winning thread title after @MaineCoonMama nomination. You win ALL the green sweeties to keep them off of chomping Jack. Tasty! (@Cheekymonk3y had the highest noms, but it was before post 500 and contained swearsies, soz pals, no...

Thread title from the slightly-modified words of @BlendedSlop , nominated by @plentyofpepper. Congratulations, you win a lifetime supply of Del Monte tinned prunes (mind your teeth, may contain stones, please don't ask awkward questions about Del Monte being implicated in modern slavery...

Bing Bong, it's new thread time. Thank you @Landslide for nomming @LizzieE. for thread title, you win first look at the memoir book that just ain't coming. Lucky you! Toot toot! Jack is still awol after her foray into classical art poses and the canal mithered away. Pink button above is the...