Thetummydiaries #6 Lottie Drynan the innocent one, ‘accidentally’ opening presents to ruin all the fun

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disillusionedbythegram said:
I don’t think she’s actually gone through her birth story properly? From what I can gather though she wanted a birth in a pool following hypnobirthing and I think she needed some sort of medical intervention.
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She hasn't shared the full story but she made some comment on that weird bathtub story at that place in Wales about the fact she didn't get the water birth she wanted. From the way her stories were shared she wasn't in hospital an overly long time after birth so there can't have been anything of huge health significance for either her or the baby. I imagine she had forceps or something. Em Clarkson had to have a c-section and isn't making the song and dance Lottie is. Someone I know irl had a baby last month and was in labour for 4 days after being induced, they were so close to doing an emergency c-section but she managed to deliver vaginally however was unable to pick the baby up for over a week after because of the pain her body was in after 4 days of hard labour... Yet she's not making as much noise as Lottie is over her seemingly traumatic birth. I get she didn't get the birth plan/moodboard she wanted but very few women do because that isn't how things work when it comes the the human body and childbirth. Her baby arrived safely, surely that's the end goal of labour however it happens? She really needs to get over herself if she's getting this caught up on the idea of what should have been when she has a little baby girl watching and learning behaviours. Those that have truly traumatic births, like the commenter further up this page are a completely different thing and that has a profound impact on them and that shouldn't be diminished. However, once again Lottie seems to want to claim something that isn't a thing for her because she needs some label.

I saw the owner of her agency did a post on Insta that's doing the rounds about setting up the agency. I looked on their website to see if she is still represented by them which she is, but apparently she was named "chronic illness blogger of the year 2020" which I didn't know. I guess as she gives herself a new one every 6 months that's not hard 😅.
 
So I work in the operating theatre and we always have an empty theatre to allow for “labour ward emergencies” and the amount of women that come flying in crying as it’s not the birth they wanted etc etc

like I get it, no one would ideally pick a section or forceps BUT it’s what is safest for mum and baby!

I had to have an emergency section for my boy as he just refused to come out 🤦‍♀️

BUT IT SHOULD BE ON EVERYONES BIRTH PLAN!

….”and if my perfect mood board birth should fail, as long as we are both safe at the end, I will allow anything”….

Dumb witch
 
Lahne said:
Reading one of her replies on her post she’s said that she’s angry with how much the trauma of the birth has stolen from her.

Trying to work out how to put this…I had a traumatic birth (so much so that I decided not to have another child when I had previously wanted 2 or 3) and it was horrible to deal with afterwards. But id gone into the whole thing very prepared for things that might go wrong, for the pain, ready for every eventuality. For someone who refused to read anything about life with a baby after pregnancy, refused to read or listen to anything even vaguely negative about labour or the realities of being a parent and whose preparation for labour involved some very expensive (probably gifted) Hypno birth stuff and making a bleeping MOOD BOARD, I can imagine that things not actually going to plan was the main trauma. And therefore my sympathy is limited because FFS she needed to open her eyes to what was going to happen.
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I also had a similar sounding experience giving birth 4 months ago. Luckily I had friends around me who had births that didn’t go to plan as well and so I was prepared in my mind that ultimately safe baby, safe mum was the only thing that mattered. I think all of this hypnobirthing has a lot to answer for. Women constantly being told what their bodies are ‘designed’ to do. It’s setting women up for feeling like failures.

I feel sorry for Lottie that this is what happened to her, however many people did try and tell her to have a plan b etc but she didn’t want to hear it. Although then again that’s another part of all the hypnobirthing guff- only seek out positive birth stories in order to keep you in a positive mindset.
 
clmay said:
I also had a similar sounding experience giving birth 4 months ago. Luckily I had friends around me who had births that didn’t go to plan as well and so I was prepared in my mind that ultimately safe baby, safe mum was the only thing that mattered. I think all of this hypnobirthing has a lot to answer for. Women constantly being told what their bodies are ‘designed’ to do. It’s setting women up for feeling like failures.

I feel sorry for Lottie that this is what happened to her, however many people did try and tell her to have a plan b etc but she didn’t want to hear it. Although then again that’s another part of all the hypnobirthing guff- only seek out positive birth stories in order to keep you in a positive mindset.
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I so agree with this. I do think that hypno birthing has a place and can calm fears about labour and I can imagine that if your birth goes well you’d be recommending it to everyone…but it’s not magic and it can’t stop things from going wrong - most of that is down to luck. So if you’re unlucky and have a bad birth but you’ve been prepped to believe that it will all go swimmingly and your body can manage on its own etc etc then it’s going to be very upsetting and disturbing when the opposite happens.
 
Fully agree with all of you, she refused to hear any negatives and any other stories other than positives. Therefore she was not prepared for childbirth. She was prepared for some insta ready fantasy of her mood board and baby popping out perfectly with a bit of a push and scream. I bet this has driven a wedge between her and Ross, since baby announcement he looked dreadful and I wonder if maybe it wasn’t planned at all and he has been thrown in at the deep end.
It is a shame if she is suffering from PND, however like mentioned above many other women struggle through that with a career to get back to looming, minimal financial stability and sometimes not even a partner or parents to rely upon has the upper hand for sympathy.
We all knew Grottie would not cope with not being centre of attention and having another human more important than her that she has to prioritise above all else. So I believe some is self inflicted because of her poor attitude to life in general, let everyone do everything for me and I will do FA and expect to be centre of attention and object of everyone’s affections.
 
Forgot she existed until she posted that waffle. I’m very sorry if she genuinely has PND because it’s horrendous but I’m not sure she does?
She’s annoyed she’s no longer the centre of attention, that everyone has stopped fawning over her because she’s not pregnant anymore.

She’s co-opted someone else’s traumatic birth story and decided she wants to have had a traumatic birth because that might get her some
More attention.

I agree, I was told I’d have a difficult birth (luckily wasn’t in the end) and basically got told - write what you want in your birth preferences but medical staff will do what’s best for you and baby.
And guess what? I wholeheartedly agreed because they know best.

She doesn’t live in the real world. She’s on a downer because it’s been a little bit hard, like it is for everyone, and she doesn’t like it.

I don’t know if the cheating comment was bullshit for bullshits sake (looks like it) but how can you complain when he cheated on his ex to be with you? History repeats Lottie. Not like you’ve been so easy going and caring.
 
NO ONE runs like this! NO ONE.
 

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Very few of my friends with children have ended up with the birth they had planned, either being induced or having an emergency c section. I understand that it may be disappointing and not the birth you wanted but there are so many people who go through this on a daily basis! I would also hope that expectant mothers are warned that there is a chance this could happen?
 
I think it's normal to feel sad about the birth you feel you missed out on.. I wanted a water birth with as little pain relief as possible... I had an emergency c section in the end and an epidural but I knew things could change and rolled with it.

I have a friend who was so against medical advice all through pregnancy, declined GTT and growth scans and midwife appointments... Only wanted a home birth nothing else.. Ended up with her waters having been broken for almost 4 DAYS, had a c section under general anesthetic and a huge baby than needed to go to NICU they both almost died... Yet she seems to be so hard done by all about her... Very much like Lottie... Woe is me!
 
I’m not a mum yet and literally cannot wrap my head around these people you mention who are so glued to an idea. Imagine going in for surgery on your leg and saying you want it in a certain way with music playing and the surgeon should do x,y,z?! Lol. I just don’t get it. Get baby and me out alive and I’ll be fine. I do think insta has a lot to blame for romanticising babies and being pregnant
 
Greencatfysh said:
I’m not a mum yet and literally cannot wrap my head around these people you mention who are so glued to an idea. Imagine going in for surgery on your leg and saying you want it in a certain way with music playing and the surgeon should do x,y,z?! Lol. I just don’t get it. Get baby and me out alive and I’ll be fine. I do think insta has a lot to blame for romanticising babies and being pregnant
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I remember going to NCT antenatal classes and being asked about birth plans. Mine literally said “do anything you need to do to get the baby out safely and keep us both alive”. Some of the other women were specifying which bleeping scented candles they wanted. I thought that was mad even before I’d been through labour but I remember thinking (in absolute screaming agony about 15 hours into my 40 hour labour) that if anyone had started lighting scented candles at that point I’d have been so furious that I’d have used them to light their pubes on fire.
 
Lahne said:
I remember going to NCT antenatal classes and being asked about birth plans. Mine literally said “do anything you need to do to get the baby out safely and keep us both alive”. Some of the other women were specifying which bleeping scented candles they wanted. I thought that was mad even before I’d been through labour but I remember thinking (in absolute screaming agony about 15 hours into my 40 hour labour) that if anyone had started lighting scented candles at that point I’d have been so furious that I’d have used them to light their pubes on fire.
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haha this, I was induced and they brought in some aromatherapy oils and put them right next to my head, they lasted about five minutes before I told them to get rid of them immediately. They stank and were not helping at all 😂
 
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