The Tim Tracker #103 Hi Marie!

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Quasimodo

Quasimodo

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Thread title courtesy of @SirHiss and some Tracker stan named Marie who is denial she's part of a cult and would probably have totally fallen for Ted Bundy's "niceness" and charm.

We may be finally hopefully done with more redundant cruise vlogs until next year or until Dim loses his mind and ditches his tumor wife and 2 spawn so he can do a solo cruise and wear all his plastic cruise medals around his neck along with a platinum lanyard so he has something to brag to Goofy about and something to yell after Chip and Dale as a pick-up line as he runs after them while zooming in on their furry butts.

Will Dim ever buy larger swim trunks?

Will Ginn ever be able to survive not eating shrimp for more than a week?

Will her nose ring become embedded?

Will Prop #2 be born with thrush and smell like sourdough?

Will J¢ pick up a Swiffer sponsorship for spending so much time picking up debris from the floor?


Stay tuned!

And check out the wiki if you haven't yet: https://tattle.life/wiki/thetimtracker
 
Quasimodo said:
Thread title courtesy of @SirHiss and some Tracker stan named Marie who is denial she's part of a cult and would probably have totally fallen for Ted Bundy's "niceness" and charm.

We may be finally hopefully done with more redundant cruise vlogs until next year or until Dim loses his mind and ditches his tumor wife and 2 spawn so he can do a solo cruise and wear all his plastic cruise medals around his neck along with a platinum lanyard so he has something to brag to Goofy about and something to yell after Chip and Dale as a pick-up line as he runs after them while zooming in on their furry butts.

Will Dim ever buy larger swim trunks?

Will Ginn ever be able to survive not eating shrimp for more than a week?

Will her nose ring become embedded?

Will Prop #2 be born with thrush and smell like sourdough?

Will J¢ pick up a Swiffer sponsorship for spending so much time picking up debris from the floor?


Stay tuned!

And check out the wiki if you haven't yet: https://tattle.life/wiki/thetimtracker
Click to expand...

The thrush and sourdough part got me. I spit out a little of my drink. 😂
 
That IG breakfast was the most un-Tracker thing I’ve seen. Fruit?? Oatmeal?? Açaí bowl?? Going out in the cold and rain??

They must’ve seen the photos we’ve been posting of them busting out of their swimwear.

And I’m sure they stopped off somewhere to get a second breakfast of meat on their way home.
 
The lack of self-awareness these two have is bonkers! Dim actually says “…the only complaint I have…” at the end of the latest vlog which of course includes complaint after complaint. What average folks think as negative reactions (complaints)…they seem to consider just normal observations. They must be very unhappy that the attempts to buy joy aren’t working.
 
Captain Obvious."It's the last night of our trip, that means we're leaving in the morning." You couldn't make it up.
Also his pronunciation of Dauphinoise potato's ( hope spell check is correct!), was music to my ears. They flex about being 'foodies,' however he more often than not, completely mispronounces food related words.

Honest my lud, I wasn't going to watch the vlog. However, I've been waiting for a 'live' for three nights, to get on chat and have my say!.
I am becoming so 'antsie,' so I had to come on here instead for my Tracker rant! For the last two nights, I was checking until 3.00 am UK time.
THAT is how bad it is for me. Guess I should take up knitting.😉
 
I summed up the latest vlog. It’s a bit long but there was so much to unpack.
-Tim will only run the 5k if they have the medals. So it’s all about the flex of having ran the 5k, he needs something to show for it.
-Jackson interrupts them when they were talking about how Tim was going to go parasailing. I can’t wait until he gets a little bit older and has no filter and ruins the vlogs. Jenn’s lazy ass will probably leave his interruptions in the final cut. Why leave this interaction in to begin with (Jackson saying he wants to parasail and them telling him he isn’t tall enough)? It literally added nothing to the vlog.
-Concerning all the egg dishes they ordered at breakfast, Jenn says “I didn’t know you ordered one so I ordered one. I’ll eat it.” Don’t these dingbats communicate?
-After Tim ran the 5k, it switched to Jenn holding the camera doing the narrating while Jackson met Mickey and then they walked around looking for a beach chair. This added nothing of value to the vlog and should not have been included. Also didn’t need to include them talking about how someone barfed in the ocean. That’s a great picture to paint for us.
-Tim says he just ate breakfast so he is going on the “light” side for lunch. This includes a hamburger, potato salad, chips and two bleeping cookies. Tim, a light lunch would be a salad or yogurt and fruit or fish and veggies. Not a bleeping hamburger with two starches and two cookies.
-When Jenn is at the beach talking about how it is raining, the sun damage on her face is apparent. She looks extremely old here like honestly, she’s looking a decade older than her actual age.
-Tim rented a water bike thing to go out into the ocean because the parasailing was cancelled due to the rain. I understand he was disappointed that the parasailing was cancelled and he wanted to do something but why not use this as a chance to do something with Jackson? He really wanted that time away from Jenn and J$ didn’t he? Also, my goodness was he droning on during this segment. Again, this added nothing to the vlog. Nearly 6 minutes of him peddling around the water rambling about nothing. Most of this could have been cut.
-Tim walking around without a shirt is an assault on my eyes. His tattoos are really ugly (imo).
-After eating a multitude of egg dishes for breakfast and his “light” lunch of a hamburger, potato salad, chips and two cookies, they return to the ship and go to the concierge lounge for snacks. Lots of sugar for Jackson with a chocolate covered Oreo and gummy bears. This is when Tim realizes it’s actually tea time. He sounded like this is the first he is hearing of it. The Tim Tracker, a travel channel on their umpteenth cruise of the year didn’t know concierge offered tea time. Jenn also says she wishes they didn’t miss lunch because she wanted to see what the lunch menu was. JFC their lives really do revolve around food. All snark aside, they honestly should seek professional help regarding this.
-After the sailing away party they decide to go to Joyful sweets to see what offerings are there for the holidays. Jenn samples some pumpkin pie gelato but then gets a chocolate gelato cone. Tim gets a mickey gingerbread cookie.
-Now it’s time for dinner. How they aren’t full to the brim already is beyond me. They get appetizers, multiple entrees (steak, chicken, lamb) and desserts.
-Tim complains that this cruise doesn’t include a dedicated pirate night. He laments for longer than necessary about how they only got to meet Pluto and Goofy in their holiday outfits and he’s bummed out he missed the other characters in their holiday outfits.
TLDR: Tim ran the 5k in 32 minutes for the sole purpose of obtaining a medal. Parasailing was cancelled due to the rain. The Trackers ate multiple egg dishes at breakfast, a “light” lunch at Castaway Cay, had tea time snacks in the concierge lounge, had dessert before dinner then had dinner right after dessert which included appetizers, multiple entrees and more dessert. Tim and Jenn are obsessed with meeting characters in their holiday outfits.
 
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