Sober Curious tattlers support thread (Dry January and beyond!)

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It's the wine for me and I found an AF wine I could stomach so drank that instead, slowly lessening the amount I drank. I also totally substituted with the sugar my body was missing. I think it's starting to settle a bit now.

But ultimately it's got to start with the realisation of how much you will gain from cutting down or giving up. Clearer mornings, more money, better health etc. That is always what stops me from sinking a bottle.of wine a night. My life is so much fuller without booze.
 
Just wondering how people told their family they don't want to drink anymore? I was a social drinker but a mess of a drunk so have kicked the habit but my family are big social drinkers and I'm not sure how understanding they'll be so I've avoided the conversation so far!
 
Influencing is not a job said:
Just wondering how people told their family they don't want to drink anymore? I was a social drinker but a mess of a drunk so have kicked the habit but my family are big social drinkers and I'm not sure how understanding they'll be so I've avoided the conversation so far!
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I mostly found they didn't give a tit about my drinking as they only care about themselves 🤣🤣
 
Hi guys! I think lockdown made me realise I really didn’t miss the hangovers from going on nights ‘out out’ if I am to drink now I prefer to day drink. Even more so be the designated driver!
 
I plan to challenge myself to an AF December for the first time.
For me 2021 has unexpectedly been about sorting my drinking out for the first time ever. I've not totally stopped this year but I've had at least 6 months overall of not drinking at all, and I want to end the year on a positive note!
I'm dreading the social pressure from everyone to be honest including my boyfriend. It's not just dealing with one social event, it's the whole month, like work social, two birthdays, then Christmas day boxing day new years etc. I'll be so proud of myself for doing it and frankly if my BF cannot be supportive then it's not a healthy relationship is it.
 
ComeForTheX StayForTheY said:
I plan to challenge myself to an AF December for the first time.
For me 2021 has unexpectedly been about sorting my drinking out for the first time ever. I've not totally stopped this year but I've had at least 6 months overall of not drinking at all, and I want to end the year on a positive note!
I'm dreading the social pressure from everyone to be honest including my boyfriend. It's not just dealing with one social event, it's the whole month, like work social, two birthdays, then Christmas day boxing day new years etc. I'll be so proud of myself for doing it and frankly if my BF cannot be supportive then it's not a healthy relationship is it.
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You go girl!!

There are some really good AF cocktail recipes around which may make the drinks feel christmassy and special. Also, IKEA's alcohol free mulled wine is sooo good!

I drank this weekend, barely anything compared to 2020 (2 small glasses saturday, 3 small glasses yesterday) but woke up this morning with a huge headache and feeling like tit. Felt all sorts of guilt but tried to brush them aside. I don't want to be completely sober 😫😫
 
Westcoasthippydreamgirl said:
You go girl!!

There are some really good AF cocktail recipes around which may make the drinks feel christmassy and special. Also, IKEA's alcohol free mulled wine is sooo good!

I drank this weekend, barely anything compared to 2020 (2 small glasses saturday, 3 small glasses yesterday) but woke up this morning with a huge headache and feeling like tit. Felt all sorts of guilt but tried to brush them aside. I don't want to be completely sober 😫😫
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Thanks! Ooooh must try the IKEA mulled wine 👍
Do you mind me asking why you don't want to be completely sober? I go back and forth on this a lot....! I think for me my problem is I can easily slip into the habit of drinking every day so maybe the solution is to quit permanently, for me. But yh that seems so drastic.
 
ComeForTheX StayForTheY said:
Thanks! Ooooh must try the IKEA mulled wine 👍
Do you mind me asking why you don't want to be completely sober? I go back and forth on this a lot....! I think for me my problem is I can easily slip into the habit of drinking every day so maybe the solution is to quit permanently, for me. But yh that seems so drastic.
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There are a few reasons...I have never had a problem with alcohol or binge drinking or blackouts etc. I am also a bit sensitive and triggered by cutting anything out entirely as I become a bit obsessive (it's also why I am massive antidiet but that is another thread), I am Italian and from a family of drinkers who love a nice drink and the thought of not sharing a glass of prosecco whilst in an Italian town with my family makes me sad. I also don't want to label myself as SOBER as I can see myself being excluded by friends and family. They are none the wiser if I accept a glass of wine at their house and never drink any more than that. I am lucky at the moment I can stop at one or two.

I love Millie Gooch's outlook of saying she had a relationship with alcohol and now it is over, line in the sand etc but I just don't think I can get there.
 
I've been sticking to no alcohol from Sun to Thurs and finding it really manageable. I found a really nice low calorie AF beer to drink during the week and I'm loving the clear heads in the morning! I was really ready to cut down which helped massively. I feel like I have broken a really bad habit and I just don't see me slipping back into having a drink every night again 🤞🤞. My big problem now is I am drinking a full bottle of wine/ prosecco on Fri & Sat night. I can't just have 1 or 2 glasses, it's the whole bottle. I am still loving having a drink at the weekend but a bottle is too much but I can't seem to scale back!??
 
I’ve cut down massively compared to last year. I did dry jan and then have pretty much stuck to friday or sat only generally. I kept with the try dry app to log it and I’ve had majority of dry days and cut my drinking score in half. I don’t think I want to become teetotal but just have a good grasp of drinking and not binge as much. It’s a shame wine and gin tastes so good 🤦🏼‍♀️
 
Lalalalaaaaaa85 said:
I’ve been on and off here all year and had some really good months and really bad ones but definitely planning on making 2022 better. I don’t want to overwhelm myself by saying I’m going sober for any particular time frame but I’m cutting alcohol out for a while, getting back to the gym and just doing more good things for my wellbeing.

I’m quite excited for 2022 ✨
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My advice would be to put a bit of a time frame on it. "for a while" will leave little sense of accomplishment. I did 100 days last year, and set a countdown on my phone, so on difficult days I could see how far I had come or how long I had left. At the end of the 100 days I felt a real sense of achievement. Knowing I was going to complete something kept me going! Try a smaller time frame and if / when you reach that goal try extending it? Little wins! ❤️
 
Influencing is not a job said:
My advice would be to put a bit of a time frame on it. "for a while" will leave little sense of accomplishment. I did 100 days last year, and set a countdown on my phone, so on difficult days I could see how far I had come or how long I had left. At the end of the 100 days I felt a real sense of achievement. Knowing I was going to complete something kept me going! Try a smaller time frame and if / when you reach that goal try extending it? Little wins! ❤️
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I get that. I’ve just found every year I try and do dry Jan and every year I find the pressure is too much for me. I was wondering if maybe a ‘one day at a time’ approach might work better.

Maybe a smaller time frame is the way to find a middle ground. Or maybe I just need to give myself a kick up the arse 🤣 stop pandering
 
ComeForTheX StayForTheY said:
I did 2 mini glasses of port and a large glass of red wine on Christmas day, all very enjoyable and no hangover today. I think I know when to switch to water / cups of tea now, rather than drinking through til bed time!
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Fantastic!!! I have managed 3 big family gatherings so far and have only had one drink at each. Drank loads of lovely AF drinks and never felt like I was missing out, especially when seeing my very hungover relatives 🤣
 
I did Sober October and found it really good at the time. I thought that it would lead to me having a more moderate relationship with alcohol when I returned to drinking in November, however I found the opposite to be true and I drank a lot more than normal. I do want to make changes in January but I'm wary of doing Dry Jan in case it just leads me to binging again afterwards. My plan is to only drink on weekends or social events going forward and rigidly stick to 14 units or less a week. I am seriously considering just giving up as well - I will see how I do with moderation in Jan, if I fail then it may be time to admit I need to just stop, or stick to social drinking only.
 
I’m going to be doing Dry Jan and hopefully longer but we’ll see how I go. I’ve actually already started after a bad hangover on Boxing day so I’m 5 days in.
I am normally quite good at moderation but then in certain situations I get excited and don’t know when to stop. Which have caused loss of memory in some instances. Plus my hangovers are so bad I need a break.
 
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