LilandLife

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I really think there re so many red flags, Isla needs support dealing with her issues and would benefit from having counseling. Kieran must find it stressful, and Abbie, and if they are already in family therapy it’s probably already come up. Either
Lil babied and spoiled Isla and it’s a shame she doesn’t think it’s a significant issue and wants to bury her head in the sand.
 
Well she’s not going to get consistency from her parents, and after all they seem absorbed in working in Kieran’s alcoholism and Lil wants to run her business from home plus a new baby. I do genuinely think a psychologist would help her, and I’m trying to be fair minded.

I do think her behavioral issues are more than can be straightened out by her parents, if it were that easy I think they would have made improvements.
 
Aussie girl said:
I really think there re so many red flags, Isla needs support dealing with her issues and would benefit from having counseling. Kieran must find it stressful, and Abbie, and if they are already in family therapy it’s probably already come up. Either
Lil babied and spoiled Isla and it’s a shame she doesn’t think it’s a significant issue and wants to bury her head in the sand.
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red flags such as?
She doesn’t have ‘issues’ - she is 3 and just needs her parents to set clear boundaries.
She isn’t the only kid to cut her own hair, or a siblings or an animals. It doesn’t make her feral or a problem child.
Kids don’t know their own strength and may mishandle people or animals but that’s when they need their parents to tell them when to be gentle etc.
My parents fostered for many years and that is when you get to see truly feral children with behavioural issues.
 
JSquared said:
red flags such as?
She doesn’t have ‘issues’ - she is 3 and just needs her parents to set clear boundaries.
She isn’t the only kid to cut her own hair, or a siblings or an animals. It doesn’t make her feral or a problem child.
Kids don’t know their own strength and may mishandle people or animals but that’s when they need their parents to tell them when to be gentle etc.
My parents fostered for many years and that is when you get to see truly feral children with behavioural issues.
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I agree to an extent but Lil has said a few times previously how jealous Isla is of the dog and how she’d lash out to hurt the dog as a retaliation for not getting the attention she feels she’s entitled to.

Clear boundaries would absolutely make a difference to her and helping her understand her behaviour is wrong but she’s clearly struggling to cope with her feelings.

I don’t know whether her kid needs therapy or not, but some kids just do need additional support far beyond what a parent can give. My friend had to send her kid to a therapist when her sibling was born as she was so unbelievably jealous and lashing out on the entire family and nothing they could do was improving the situation. She was referred to psychological services via her GP and went to a number of sessions which helped. My friend had done everything she could to resolve the situation before taking that step and she had a far more structured home life and rules and boundaries in place than Isla has.

I think Lil would benefit massively from a stern talking to about being less selfish, less indulged and so inconsiderate of other people’s needs as she thinks of nobody but herself and it’s really telling when you look at her immediate family.
 
TheWitchIsBack said:
I agree to an extent but Lil has said a few times previously how jealous Isla is of the dog and how she’d lash out to hurt the dog as a retaliation for not getting the attention she feels she’s entitled to.

Clear boundaries would absolutely make a difference to her and helping her understand her behaviour is wrong but she’s clearly struggling to cope with her feelings.

I don’t know whether her kid needs therapy or not, but some kids just do need additional support far beyond what a parent can give. My friend had to send her kid to a therapist when her sibling was born as she was so unbelievably jealous and lashing out on the entire family and nothing they could do was improving the situation. She was referred to psychological services via her GP and went to a number of sessions which helped. My friend had done everything she could to resolve the situation before taking that step and she had a far more structured home life and rules and boundaries in place than Isla has.

I think Lil would benefit massively from a stern talking to about being less selfish, less indulged and so inconsiderate of other people’s needs as she thinks of nobody but herself and it’s really telling when you look at her immediate family.
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I agree, Lil definitely needs a reality check. She needs to get off of insta and pay attention to her whole household. Not just the kids but K too.
 
This depends with the psychologist.
I’m a social worker and 100% they need some early help intervention. A family support worker, parenting practitioner or the Health visitor assistants.
With K being an alcoholic this would count as a child trauma and in our locality Isla would meet the threshold for having a play therapist.
Lil need to start acting now, she will have her health visitor back soon and hopefully they will recommend both parents going on the family links parenting group as well as having some Early help 1:1 intervention.
It’s going to get a lot worse when number 3 comes along!
 
Pink Sparkle said:
This depends with the psychologist.
I’m a social worker and 100% they need some early help intervention. A family support worker, parenting practitioner or the Health visitor assistants.
With K being an alcoholic this would count as a child trauma and in our locality Isla would meet the threshold for having a play therapist.
Lil need to start acting now, she will have her health visitor back soon and hopefully they will recommend both parents going on the family links parenting group as well as having some Early help 1:1 intervention.
It’s going to get a lot worse when number 3 comes along!
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Sounds like your area has good provisions for families. I struggled to get any help at all, and our situation bares many similarities to Lils. Literally begged and pleaded for help and got nothing.
 
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