James and Maeva Made in Chelsea

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It’s such odd behaviour, I’m now starting to think is she’s suffering PND or worse without knowing.

It’s absolutely unheard of to do what she has done. I can’t bare the thought of the damage this has done to Beau.

On the MIC thread people were defending them and I honestly cba to get it rows with people online, but you can sure guess it is those without children.
 
rhobh17 said:
It’s such odd behaviour, I’m now starting to think is she’s suffering PND or worse without knowing.

It’s absolutely unheard of to do what she has done. I can’t bare the thought of the damage this has done to Beau.

On the MIC thread people were defending them and I honestly cba to get it rows with people online, but you can sure guess it is those without children.
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Actually I was defending them and I have 2 children. One who is only 2 years old. I defended Maeva because my partner had covid when my daughter was a baby (and it was all lockdown) and I was scared so banished him to the bedroom for 10 days and he didn't hold her or kiss her or anything. But the reason I defended her was because medical anxiety is a real thing. Illness anxiety is real. If she panicked that the baby could get covid and die then that's a real fear. We have no idea what she was thinking all she knows is that it was the best thing to do. Maybe she wasn't well enough to look after him?
Anyway, this is tattle so I understand its here to judge influencers, celebs etc..
I'm not a fan of Maeva, I think she's a bit of a bully but everyone parents differently and all I was saying was that I could see where she was coming from.
 
Proseccofiend2022 said:
Actually I was defending them and I have 2 children. One who is only 2 years old. I defended Maeva because my partner had covid when my daughter was a baby (and it was all lockdown) and I was scared so banished him to the bedroom for 10 days and he didn't hold her or kiss her or anything. But the reason I defended her was because medical anxiety is a real thing. Illness anxiety is real. If she panicked that the baby could get covid and die then that's a real fear. We have no idea what she was thinking all she knows is that it was the best thing to do. Maybe she wasn't well enough to look after him?
Anyway, this is tattle so I understand its here to judge influencers, celebs etc..
I'm not a fan of Maeva, I think she's a bit of a bully but everyone parents differently and all I was saying was that I could see where she was coming from.
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I don’t really want to get into a covid debate 3 years down the line but it was more understandable during lockdown when a lot less was known, plus your baby also still had one parent looking after them, and still had its mother.

I do understand about medical/health anxieties but is that a good enough reason to make a decision that could seriously affect the baby emotionally (bond/attachment wise?). Being apart from a tiny newborn for ten days - by choice - for an extremely low risk (to babies) virus is not doing what is best for the baby. If it is anxiety that forced that behaviour then the anxiety has taken over and ultimately it’s the baby it impacts.

I’m curious to know what you think about them going out last night for ‘date night’ ? And also ‘picking him up later’ rather than rushing over there first thing? This makes me think even more it was all selfish reasons and not actually a genuine anxiety.
 
I have a lot of health anxiety with my kid, to the extent that I have seen the GP about it and would get therapy if I could afford it. But my logic in this situation would be that by the time Maeva tested positive the baby would have been heavily exposed to it (think how much close contact there is between a newborn and it’s mother) and it would be too late to separate/negatives would outweigh any benefit.
We will never know the truth but I imagine she felt like tit and wanted a week on the sofa, which is what all parents want when they’re ill but (usually) unfortunately have to suck it up and carry on

the date night and James coming home to a covid positive Maeva rather than go be with his baby after his ski holiday is what makes this situation look bad rather than just an anxiety thing
 
Tofino said:
I don’t really want to get into a covid debate 3 years down the line but it was more understandable during lockdown when a lot less was known, plus your baby also still had one parent looking after them, and still had its mother.

I do understand about medical/health anxieties but is that a good enough reason to make a decision that could seriously affect the baby emotionally (bond/attachment wise?). Being apart from a tiny newborn for ten days - by choice - for an extremely low risk (to babies) virus is not doing what is best for the baby. If it is anxiety that forced that behaviour then the anxiety has taken over and ultimately it’s the baby it impacts.

I’m curious to know what you think about them going out last night for ‘date night’ ? And also ‘picking him up later’ rather than rushing over there first thing? This makes me think even more it was all selfish reasons and not actually a genuine anxiety.
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No absolutely I don't either and I know its different because my baby still had me but she was still missing that contact with her dad which I felt bad about but was extremely worried about us all getting ill. I can only agree with the others and say she wanted James to look after her. However, MIL could've offered? We don't know and I'm quite wary of judging others parenting when we all know how hard parenting is and most of the time, you can't do right for doing wrong.

However, ordinarily I'd say a date night last night was absolutely fine IF you'd been looking after your baby and needed to reconnect as a couple. Again, we do this every so often my MIL will have the children and we'll go out for a meal etc... I think that's fine and normal BUT they haven't seen their baby for 10 days. Knowing me (and others) I would've ran around there and got my baby as soon as that test turned negative and wouldn't have had a date night. That is something I can't get my head around and actually can't find a reason why they would've done that?!

So whilst I get reasons for worrying over covid impacting the baby, I can't think why James couldn't have had him at his mums so baby could have at least one parent and I don't get why they'd have a date night last night instead of getting their newborn. They've just had 10 days alone 🤷‍♀️ baffled!
 
I’m still totally shocked that she’s been without her newborn for TEN DAYS and they still went out for dinner together instead of going to get him.

I bet the MIL is absolutely raging and must be judging her so much!

That poor little boy

I expect Maeva will end up like Louise Thompson and Millie Macintosh and do everything she can to avoid spending time with her child despite not working
 
I think a lot of people could understand Maeva being worried about covid affecting the baby and even though it wouldn’t be what I would do I could appreciate her reasoning with James’ mum looking after him. What I can’t get my head around is James coming back from skiing (or even going skiing in the first place if I’m really honest) and not going to the baby, going home to Maeva and the two of them continuing without Beau for another week. The date night is absolutely unbelievable and makes no sense at all, I can’t understand not seeing your baby for all that time and then going out on a date night without him. It’s very very sad.
 
Proseccofiend2022 said:
No absolutely I don't either and I know its different because my baby still had me but she was still missing that contact with her dad which I felt bad about but was extremely worried about us all getting ill. I can only agree with the others and say she wanted James to look after her. However, MIL could've offered? We don't know and I'm quite wary of judging others parenting when we all know how hard parenting is and most of the time, you can't do right for doing wrong.

However, ordinarily I'd say a date night last night was absolutely fine IF you'd been looking after your baby and needed to reconnect as a couple. Again, we do this every so often my MIL will have the children and we'll go out for a meal etc... I think that's fine and normal BUT they haven't seen their baby for 10 days. Knowing me (and others) I would've ran around there and got my baby as soon as that test turned negative and wouldn't have had a date night. That is something I can't get my head around and actually can't find a reason why they would've done that?!

So whilst I get reasons for worrying over covid impacting the baby, I can't think why James couldn't have had him at his mums so baby could have at least one parent and I don't get why they'd have a date night last night instead of getting their newborn. They've just had 10 days alone 🤷‍♀️ baffled!
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Yeah I guess whilst I couldn’t agree with the covid decision, I accept the possibility she may have made it thinking it was best for Beau even if I think it was misguided and the wrong decision.

I just don’t think there is any justification for date night last night (not against date nights, just not when you’ve already had ten days of being away from your newborn!), not going to get him first thing this morning and also James returning to Maeva rather than to Beau. They are majorly selfish decisions when you have a 5 week old baby and it’s worrying if they are like that with a tiny baby then how they will continue to be with him.

I haven’t figured out the dynamics of their relationship yet but my father enabled my mother and he always put her needs before us kids and it’s really damaging. Children need to have secure relationships with their parents. So if Maeva demanded James be with her instead of Beau then that is also concerning.

If I was Maeva and sent Beau away as a last resort because of how worried I was he would get covid, then I would have absolutely insisted James go be with Beau because it would devastate me that he was without a parent for so long. I’m actually a solo parent and even though my parents are quite involved, it’s still not the same as a parent-child relationship.
 
Those first few weeks of a baby’s life are so important for bonding - particularly when you’re a first time mum and you’re like a rabbit in headlights because your life has irrevocably changed forever and you have no clue as to what you’re doing.
There is no way that I’d have sent my baby away, covid or no covid. Particularly when it was widely proven that covid had little impact on babies and children. If Maeva was struggling, the MIL could have moved in to help. And don’t get me started on that waste of space Jemz. The two of them are hideous individuals.
 
i
SophSpinsSillyStories said:
Those first few weeks of a baby’s life are so important for bonding - particularly when you’re a first time mum and you’re like a rabbit in headlights because your life has irrevocably changed forever and you have no clue as to what you’re doing.
There is no way that I’d have sent my baby away, covid or no covid. Particularly when it was widely proven that covid had little impact on babies and children. If Maeva was struggling, the MIL could have moved in to help. And don’t get me started on that waste of space Jemz. The two of them are hideous individuals.
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You have to wonder the impact it will have had on all of them, being 10 days apart. It can be a real shock to the system when you first bring a baby home. They’ve now had ten days of R&R and time as a baby free couple. Are they going to find it harder to get back to the demands of having a newborn again? I wonder how quickly and how often they will have another date night (overnight) or leave baby with his mum again so they can have time to themselves.

The night out last night instead of getting their baby back asap tells me there was already a problem with bonding or the time apart has resulted in the bond deteriorating. It will be interesting to see what happens over the next few weeks.
 
It's so odd...in the early weeks with both my babies I was constantly checking they were breathing. Which isn't a great way to be, they both needed help to breathe when they were born and my son stopped breathing his first night so I think i was overly anxious about it...but I cannot imagine not being able to check on my newborn baby. I had SUCH a huge sense that no one could look after these kids like I can.
It's sad.
 
Tofino said:
Yeah I guess whilst I couldn’t agree with the covid decision, I accept the possibility she may have made it thinking it was best for Beau even if I think it was misguided and the wrong decision.

I just don’t think there is any justification for date night last night (not against date nights, just not when you’ve already had ten days of being away from your newborn!), not going to get him first thing this morning and also James returning to Maeva rather than to Beau. They are majorly selfish decisions when you have a 5 week old baby and it’s worrying if they are like that with a tiny baby then how they will continue to be with him.

I haven’t figured out the dynamics of their relationship yet but my father enabled my mother and he always put her needs before us kids and it’s really damaging. Children need to have secure relationships with their parents. So if Maeva demanded James be with her instead of Beau then that is also concerning.

If I was Maeva and sent Beau away as a last resort because of how worried I was he would get covid, then I would have absolutely insisted James go be with Beau because it would devastate me that he was without a parent for so long. I’m actually a solo parent and even though my parents are quite involved, it’s still not the same as a parent-child relationship.
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I absolutely agree with you! The date night, James not being with Beau and their relationship is all odd and worrying. Like I said whilst I can see why she may have given Beau to the MIL (again not something I'd do) I can't fathom the other choices.

You sound like an awesome parent ❤️
 
Toad in the Hole said:
I have a lot of health anxiety with my kid, to the extent that I have seen the GP about it and would get therapy if I could afford it. But my logic in this situation would be that by the time Maeva tested positive the baby would have been heavily exposed to it (think how much close contact there is between a newborn and it’s mother) and it would be too late to separate/negatives would outweigh any benefit.
We will never know the truth but I imagine she felt like tit and wanted a week on the sofa, which is what all parents want when they’re ill but (usually) unfortunately have to suck it up and carry on

the date night and James coming home to a covid positive Maeva rather than go be with his baby after his ski holiday is what makes this situation look bad rather than just an anxiety thing
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How old is your child? Because I think for about a year after a baby, you can get some form of perinatal support for mental health. That might just be my area though.
I know this because I was diagnosed with PTSD 8 weeks after my third child as my second child passed away and I was offered free therapy for about 6 months.
Sooo worth googling services and see if there's any help available depending on your child's age/ a charity may be able to help.
I know exactly how you feel though and it is awful. X
 
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