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Speaking of (the latter, not the former), we wanted to have a listen to Pet Slop Bots Nightmeat the other week and fell down a glorious Slopbot Slop-hole, including…
All the rest, at this official link,
including Nightmeat (for all your Nightmeat needs) and Croydon (to sort your Daymeat desires) with stops off to the Onion Police (chop chop!) and Two Sloups, trying to kill a man with stuffing in a soup and many more favourites! Just wonderful!
Who remembers the novelty of 24hr telly in the late 80s? ITV stopped shutting down with the national anthem each evening and broadcasted a load of crap overnight instead. The novelty of watching telly at 2am! James Whale, Phil Donahue, Mr Bennett off Take Hart out on location bothering people who were just trying to put in their night shift… Who remembers it? And who cares?
That’s her future. To pop up on a 2010s nostalgia show ten years from now. Oh yeah, the tattooed baked bean washer who for some reason would get booked for Question Time, we’d forgotten about her.
I can believe it’s her because all that ‘yes it’s really really me’ nonsense is what she wrote in that daft selfie on thread 31 like she’s shitting Madonna or somebody and we’re all supposed to go ‘what really? really really? THE Jack Hadjibollocks HERSELF? Truly we are unworthy’ etc.
Tis I, the beneficent Mack Jackostas!
El Cioccolatte Grande’s progeny; nibbling to a shin-kicked brother; big sister to a BLACK brother did I mention my brother is black? He’s black, you know. There‘s some other generic blonde women in the fam that do women’s type work as well., IDK looking after kids or summat.
Tis I, the beneficent Mack Jackostas!
El Cioccolatte Grande’s progeny; nibbling to a shin-kicked brother; big sister to a BLACK brother did I mention my brother is black? He’s black, you know. There‘s some other generic blonde women in the fam that do women’s type work as well., IDK looking after kids or summat.
You missed out the part where she’s also parent to an imaginary whimsical Victorian child.
Or in the version over at Diva
Yeah, Jack. You’re a bleeping genius and that’s exactly why nobody wants to marry you. It’s got literally duck all to do with you being an insufferable fantasist lying narc bleep.
Sorry, I meant to stick the link in. It was Feb 2015. Just posted it on the slopalong cos she admits she nicks BBC Good Food recipes and got rumbled! https://cookingonabootstrap.com/2015/03/02/bbc-good-food-25th-birthday-party-and-i-won-a-thingy/?amp=1 Classy photo in what looks like a public bog.
tattle.life
Including VERY IMPORTANT FRIENDS SHE HASN’T MET YET.
Sorry, I meant to stick the link in. It was Feb 2015. Just posted it on the slopalong cos she admits she nicks BBC Good Food recipes and got rumbled! https://cookingonabootstrap.com/2015/03/02/bbc-good-food-25th-birthday-party-and-i-won-a-thingy/?amp=1 Classy photo in what looks like a public bog.
Sorry, I meant to stick the link in. It was Feb 2015. Just posted it on the slopalong cos she admits she nicks BBC Good Food recipes and got rumbled! https://cookingonabootstrap.com/2015/03/02/bbc-good-food-25th-birthday-party-and-i-won-a-thingy/?amp=1 Classy photo in what looks like a public bog.
Jack's fam sending each other photos of spuds when they live in a retirement community in big duck off detached houses sort of summarises how I feel about her right now
I know for a fact I've said this before but the bus story has so much. The twin victim complex/narcissism of believing everyone's looking at her and fantasising it's because they're so amazed that someone so smol has so much knowledge, but also that they all dislike her cos she's WHITE TRASH or whatever weird Americanism she's picked up from The Bold and the Beautiful this week. Imaginary precocious child conversation that is mysteriously geared to let her show off, rather than the usual chatter you'd get from a kid about what sweets he likes or what the three Olivers in his class did with snot at break time . And the best bit is the whole bus was looking at her because of this extensive knowledge but also she didn't know what UNICEF is and was going to have to go Google it.
Yeah, Jack. You’re a bleeping genius and that’s exactly why nobody wants to marry you. It’s got literally duck all to do with you being an insufferable fantasist lying narc bleep.
Whether or not it's the real Jack M who's popped up on Insta, it's good to know there are vigilant ninnies across all the social media platforms who will take note of any attempts to relaunch.
Jack: until you come clean about the money you have fraudently taken off the public and make some attempt at reparations, be aware that you will never be able to declare a clean slate and come back into public view.
Jack's fam sending each other photos of spuds when they live in a retirement community in big duck off detached houses sort of summarises how I feel about her right now
And Dave and Ev just know the neighbors all around them are gossiping “You don’t see their Jack on the telly or in THE NEWSPAPERS anymore”.
“Ooooh didn’t you hear? She went on not-Lorraine looking filthy and fucked off her chump to sling a load of slop and a strange pear and meat USB cake around, that rich fella she was gunning to marry LEFT after she stole a load of money for a nonexistent legal case, she wrote a nonsensical Victorian melodrama of a blog post to celebrate the ten year anniversary of her lurid fantasist fictional Dickensian poverty backstory that she got called out on by unprecedented numbers of people, then put out a slop manual full of household tips so dangerous her publisher had to add a safety warning and then her flying monkeys all deserted her and she admitted to conning her Patrons out of tens of thousands of pounds and blowing it all on sideboards while off her face on trammies and booze, accompanied by photos of her gurning proudly while all gakked up in a bath of pennies and padding. Then to top it all off she filled an air fryer with water and bollock sausage fat!”
“For shame. And him over the road such a pillar of the community and their son in the RAF such a lovely lad too.”
And Dave and Ev just know the neighbors all around them are gossiping “You don’t see their Jack on the telly or in THE NEWSPAPERS anymore”.
View attachment 2805177 q
“Ooooh didn’t you hear? She went on not-Lorraine looking filthy and fucked off her chump to sling a load of slop around, that rich fella she was gunning to marry LEFT after she stole a load of money for a nonexistent legal case, she wrote a nonsensical Victorian melodrama of a blog post to celebrate the ten year anniversary of her lurid fantasist fictional Dickensian poverty backstory that she got called out on by unprecedented numbers of people, then put out a slop manual full of household tips so dangerous her publisher had to add a safety warning and then her flying monkeys all deserted her and she admitted to conning her Patrons out of tens of thousands of pounds and blowing it all on sideboards while off her face on trammies and booze while being photographed all gakked up in a bath of pennies and padding. Then to top it all off she filled an air fryer with water and bollock sausage fat!”
“For shame. And him over the road such a pillar of the community and their son in the RAF such a lovely lad too.”
My non-Irish mum would be gutted if her roasties came out looking like that and then I shared it on t'internet. She makes two trays of them too, just so we can take some home. Farcical.
And Dave and Ev just know the neighbors all around them are gossiping “You don’t see their Jack on the telly or in THE NEWSPAPERS anymore”.
View attachment 2805177 q
“Ooooh didn’t you hear? She went on not-Lorraine looking filthy and fucked off her chump to sling a load of slop and a strange pear and meat USB cake around, that rich fella she was gunning to marry LEFT after she stole a load of money for a nonexistent legal case, she wrote a nonsensical Victorian melodrama of a blog post to celebrate the ten year anniversary of her lurid fantasist fictional Dickensian poverty backstory that she got called out on by unprecedented numbers of people, then put out a slop manual full of household tips so dangerous her publisher had to add a safety warning and then her flying monkeys all deserted her and she admitted to conning her Patrons out of tens of thousands of pounds and blowing it all on sideboards while off her face on trammies and booze, accompanied by photos of her gurning proudly while all gakked up in a bath of pennies and padding. Then to top it all off she filled an air fryer with water and bollock sausage fat!”
“For shame. And him over the road such a pillar of the community and their son in the RAF such a lovely lad too.”
I can't find it, but we need a photo of Jack in her raspberry jacket and roll neck looking like a penis on the TV.
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