Jack Monroe #297 I'm not a natural tax payer.

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Froggies said:
Right? When I leave a voicemail it’s always “Hi, it’s err…me, err I’ll text you”

I bet Jack is all “hi! This is Jack Monroe, Queen of the POVs, former firefighter, bestselling author, tv presenter and owner of many, many sideboards. You may remember me from slopcidents such as horse spunk lasagne and lingreenie. Call me back but be aware I may not answer as I am BUSY and need a piss and a sandwich ok?!”
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Slopcidents. 😂☠️
 
Awful said:
I've got fbpe in my twitter name, better remove it!
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I mean, I agree with them on the whole anti-Brexit thing. it's the biggest mistake this country's ever made. I even considered putting it in my own handle once upon a time. but a good measure of them are just weird cult-like followers of the very most MOR milquetoast twitter takes who would absolutely balk at the opportunity to take real action
 
ChocolateMuffin said:
Absolutely DO NOT let knowing nothing about a subject or having any experience of it, stop you from writing about it.

You literal Love Actually expert,you 🙌
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Thankyou 🥰 Writing about films I've never seen is literally my life's work. It's nice to finally get the recognition I deserve after so many years. I am now going to aggressively rest. Have a lovely evening x
 
usefullyuseless said:
Because Hugh played the PM in Love Actually and he was a good PM in that so he should be a good PM in reality. #squiglogic

Disclaimer: I've never seen Love Actually so I've no idea what type of PM he was or if the film even touched on what his stance was on food poverty
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Tbf, that sort of thing has played out well in Ukraine [serious]. So when everything goes tits up in the 'coming soon' Western Europe theatre of war, perhaps Hugh will save the day [tasteless joke].
 
moldwarp said:
And how many WC people or people in severe poverty actually read the Guardian?
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*Raises hand* I don't buy it, but according to the passive-aggressive Guardian tally I have read a lot of articles this month and should really send them some of the money that I don't have.

Sglodion said:
Edit - forgot Tattle bans MN thread links
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When I was looking into sad kitten incident, I came across a MN thread where someone questioned Jack's mental state and said that she was 'wearing it (the kitten) in a sling' at one point. 😮 Anyway, people responded that thread would be banned because MN doesn't allow speculation about people's mental health. I thought BUT I WANT TO SPECULATE ABOUT HER MENTAL HEALTH!

Orphan_Black said:
Universally liked stuff. Who the duck is donating all the peaches?!
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Lol. I kind of understand the tinned peaches thing tbh. It's a cheap dessert/snack that doesn't need to be prepared. Tinned means that it's longer-lasting than normal fruit and you don't have to wait for it to become ripe (like those horrible peaches that are rock hard and sour). 🤷‍♀️
 
usefullyuseless said:
Thankyou 🥰 Writing about films I've never seen is literally my life's work. It's nice to finally get the recognition I deserve after so many years. I am now going to aggressively rest. Have a lovely evening x
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I always thought being a film critic would be a wonderful way to earn a living. Now that I've found out you don't actually have to watch any films to do it, I am several steps closer to achieving fulfilment in my life ❤.
 
Just for clarity, as we know she loves to engage in hysterical misrepresentation of what’s written here (“they said my cat was a full Maine Coon but he’s not, aren’t they obsessed sad addict hausfraus”) I was in no way comparing her to a Nazi sympathiser, rather the contemporary understanding of quisling as a term for someone collaborating with the enemy against majority interests for personal gain, as per Jack making a good living from telling the feckless poor that they could feed their families on £20 per week if only they were clever enough.

She’s not a class traitor because she was never working class in the first place to betray them.

I like to think of her as a parasitic cuckoo. She was placed in the nest of the less privileged by the establishment (her media mates, Leggy, MBE daddy) and because she’s got the loudest call and the widest open gob and the sharpest elbows she’s kicked all the actual working class chicks out from the nest and she’s guzzling down all the opportunities, pretending to be the real thing for as long as she possibly can.

Sorry for the horrendous mixing of metaphors there but you catch my drift.
 
On the topic of JM 'inventing' recipes that have been around for decades, I find it interesting how she needs to take credit for literally everything, as though she's the first person in the world to try cooking on a budget. She even said as much during the Jamie Oliver rant. It takes a specific, self-obsessed mindset to conclude that you're the sole voice in budget cooking and anti-poverty campaigning, and that anyone else who does these things is stealing your patented ideas rather than contributing useful information to a collective pool of resources.

I also think it highlights how unnecessary most of her 'work' is. Her advice adds absolutely nothing. It might as well not exist. The world of budget cooking spans many cultures/cuisines; there are already actual chefs whose recipes are cheap and much more appetising than her sad slop; anti-poverty campaigners are doing meaningful work behind the scenes without spouting about how much they deserve accolades; foodbanks will continue without her intervention; there would still be voices (more informed, less annoying ones) holding the government to account. Jack has no visible talents (sorry if that's harsh) and hasn't made any effort to become skilled at anything - but in her mind she's truly indispensable.
 
Froggies said:
Right? When I leave a voicemail it’s always “Hi, it’s err…me, err I’ll text you”

I bet Jack is all “hi! This is Jack Monroe, Queen of the POVs, former firefighter, bestselling author, tv presenter and owner of many, many sideboards. You may remember me from slopcidents such as horse spunk lasagne and lingreenie. Call me back but be aware I may not answer as I am BUSY and need a piss and a sandwich ok?!”
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“…I can’t answer the phone as I’m gatecrashing all the forums desperate for someone, ANYONE to ask me anything”
 
Why you cry 😢
Ex is in Rye 😫
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Arsov Cooper said:
Tbf, that sort of thing has played out well in Ukraine [serious]. So when everything goes tits up in the 'coming soon' Western Europe theatre of war, perhaps Hugh will save the day [tasteless joke].
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The way this decade's shaping up so far, 'Hugh Grant gets elected PM and singlehandedly averts world war' probably won't even make the top 20 list of most noteworthy events by the end.
 
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