Jack Monroe #219 Why you sob? Russell Hobb

[Saint_clemmie]

What I don’t understand is how can someone who uploads so many selfies have a different hair style in every single one!?

 

[Powershower]

#1978 truther

(That is all)

You and me both!
I like her lipstick though

 

[Dogmuck]

You’re telling me these are the same person? No bleeping way.

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Yeah but on the last 2 she hadn’t closed her eyes and “slowly” said “I am worthy of love exactly as I am” five times, you mithering ninny! It’s mantra magic ffs, it’s what makes you beautiful.

 

[FrumpyCat]

I found this poor creature this morning as I went to work.

Fly high little one.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

She is definitely going for the Insta-Mum vibe isn’t she, hoping to snare a new Mrs J.

What happened to her masculine aesthetic?

 

[Hollaaa]

She is definitely going for the Insta-Mum vibe isn’t she, hoping to snare a new Mrs J.

What happened to her masculine aesthetic?

It LEFT!

 

[Saint_clemmie]

Jack, if you want to show off your lipstick and new Karen hair then just say so. No need to make up this performative bullshit.

 

[Emmapism]

You lot are on top form today. I'm currently manifesting a nice fish cake, garlicky potatoes and green beans for my tea.

Maybe if I close my eyes, click my heels three times and post a photo on Insta of my empty plate it might just happen.

 

[Veronicaaa]

You’re telling me these are the same person? No bleeping way.

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I'm not sure what is photoshop and what is work done. Her eyebrows look much lower and closer to her eyes in today's middle aged mum shots, does that mean she's had botox in her forehead? <who bleeping knows>

 

[sleepisforwimps]

Holy sweet Jesus, tried it and it worked What was supposed to happen?

She’s deleted that because she realised she hadn’t fully photoshopped the nose on the second one

Or her above her eyes.

 

[EddieBeds]

Holy sweet Jesus, tried it and it worked What was supposed to happen?

She’s deleted that because she realised she hadn’t fully photoshopped the nose on the second one

Omg I hadn’t even noticed (due to all the other trickery going on in the photos) and now can’t not see it!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Honestly before I read tattle I used to see some “catfish influencers” and think it was a joke that they painted on a new face and body, but thanks to Katie Hayes Wiki I realise it’s a thing!
Jack hasn’t given herself the “influencer” face but those selfies she posts have so many layers of touch ups- colour change, line blur, saturation, hair colour, pink cheeks, white teeth, whiter eye whites, sharper edges, face proportions and distance between features altered. It’s a lot of work, really a lot.

 

[Saint_clemmie]

What do you think Jacks doing right now?

I think she’s kicking herself after that photoshop fail, before and after selfies - wasted, inspirational quote - wasted, all those lost likes - wasted, that sweet sweet dopamine hit - wasted, oh what could have been.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

This is probably v mean girls of me but her face is starting to look like a surface pressure chart like what the weathermanlady points at and that.

Disclaimer: I don't actually understand surface pressure charts.

 

[Vanelope]

Honestly before I read tattle I used to see some “catfish influencers” and think it was a joke that they painted on a new face and body, but thanks to Katie Hayes Wiki I realise it’s a thing!
Jack hasn’t given herself the “influencer” face but those selfies she posts have so many layers of touch ups- colour change, line blur, saturation, hair colour, pink cheeks, white teeth, whiter eye whites, sharper edges, face proportions and distance between features altered. It’s a lot of work, really a lot.

Cheaper than actual cosmetic surgery but you then have to face real people who don’t recognise you!

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

Do you remember the time Jack had a massive eye?

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November 18, 2020. Screenshot: @Silver Linings

If you look at this a lot it really starts to duck with your head

 

[Lanie]

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No offense but she has aged loads recently. Bless her

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

am worthy of love exactly as I am. all cash payments

 

[PortiaControl]

That new photo is odd. How many faces can one person have?! There's something a bit Jessica Chastain about it. Like she's run it through FaceApp with her face.

At least she's ditched the Weatherfield One glasses I suppose.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

I can’t get over how different she looks in those deleted selfies. I can’t look at them too long because it’s freaking me out a bit, like some kind of uncanny valley effect.

Imagine putting a quote about being exactly as you are and then changing your face THAT much. I almost feel sorry for her (almost!) because there‘s nothing wrong with her real face at all.