Cookiecookie
VIP Member
That would actually make so much sense!
Jack Monroe #19 Is it a show? Miguel's not sure. I am Jack, hear me ROAR!
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poppycat
Well-known member
I don't think she has a clue what she means. Or cares.
Words on the page to get the book out in time.
chocolate choux
VIP Member
I’m trying to imagine how Jack would bastardise sushiOh... bless her
She really has high hopes for this book if she’s expected sushi. See she’s used a carving knife emoji and NOT a break knife.
“No sushi rice? Basmati will do!”
“Don’t waste your money on fancy soy sauce. Worcestershire sauce is basically the same thing”
“Fish/meat/tofu too expensive? Go out in your garden and grab some snails (0p)”
Nottonightbabe
VIP Member
Just going back to the heroic solo expedition that is Jack taking some books to a post box - why was the "stench of deep heat" permeating her carpets?? What was she doing, having a good roll around?
pipkinflof
New member
I'm not 100% but I'm sure I saw at one point ages ago the admin was fundraising for something related to one of her kids. Did a bungee jump or something. Think the kid is unwell or disabled? Might be shielding so could be why they're still furloughed. But who knows!!
"Microwave mini gems for 2 minutes to use instead of nori"
OhhBacon
VIP Member
I think her Tuesday night Tv show is quite the insight into her working day. She was clearly underprepared, disorganised and hadn’t practiced. Put simply it was obvious that she hadn’t done the necessary work.
Now I can procrastinate with the best of them but if I had a show at 5pm and had done no prep for it then I would be up early and spend the whole day preparing so I am ready, even if I dicked around all morning at 1pm I would give myself some stern words and crack on.
Say I start at 1pm, that’s 4 hours to tidy the shed, get my ingredients into the right spaces, check the technical stuff and run through my lines. I think it’s doable but I like a bit of pressure to get on with stuff.
So back to Jack, she reckons she spent all day preparing for that show...we know she did stuff with her hair and messed around on twitter. She clearly wastes a lot of time on the wrong things (twitter) and calls that work. She and all her super fans thought that went well and she was well prepared. She doesn’t understand what work is.
In addition to that the ‘long hours’ just shows how inept you are, I worked in an art gallery for a year. It closed at 5.30pm, I sent the figures through at 5.40pm. My colleague (total brown nosing twit) used to send them through at between 7.00pm and 8.30pm!
The owner had a discussion with me once about how hard working my colleague was, until I enquired what he was doing till that time and gently pointed out how ineffective he was. He wasn’t selling more than me, the gallery looked the same as when I left at 5.40pm. So maybe he needed help with his working day!!!!
I don’t believe the 20hours bollocks.
Now I can procrastinate with the best of them but if I had a show at 5pm and had done no prep for it then I would be up early and spend the whole day preparing so I am ready, even if I dicked around all morning at 1pm I would give myself some stern words and crack on.
Say I start at 1pm, that’s 4 hours to tidy the shed, get my ingredients into the right spaces, check the technical stuff and run through my lines. I think it’s doable but I like a bit of pressure to get on with stuff.
So back to Jack, she reckons she spent all day preparing for that show...we know she did stuff with her hair and messed around on twitter. She clearly wastes a lot of time on the wrong things (twitter) and calls that work. She and all her super fans thought that went well and she was well prepared. She doesn’t understand what work is.
In addition to that the ‘long hours’ just shows how inept you are, I worked in an art gallery for a year. It closed at 5.30pm, I sent the figures through at 5.40pm. My colleague (total brown nosing twit) used to send them through at between 7.00pm and 8.30pm!
The owner had a discussion with me once about how hard working my colleague was, until I enquired what he was doing till that time and gently pointed out how ineffective he was. He wasn’t selling more than me, the gallery looked the same as when I left at 5.40pm. So maybe he needed help with his working day!!!!
I don’t believe the 20hours bollocks.
blurstoftimes
VIP Member
there’s no point adding onions if you’re not going to cook them properly first...I gently cook my onions, celery and carrots for an hour when i make bolognese!
This recipe makes me want to heave. The bitter, crunchy uncooked onions!! Also a full 400ml tin of coconut milk to serve ONE PERSON??
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MancBee
VIP Member
I just spat out my coffee (instant, I'm poor dontcha know) at this. You've conjured up an image of her rolling around on the floor like a NOT Maine Coon Cat.
Off to get a cloth for the floor.
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What an excellent point !
Does she even have an editor?? If you wrote something with this many mistakes for a school essay you’d failI couldn't bare to read any of her writing in the book preview, but spent 20 seconds reading the food bit and found a few mistakes and I'm not even that knowledgeable on food.
Tofu isn't fermented, that's tempeh and is a very different food. Or maybe she means miso or tamari? I'm no foodie but pretty sure she's wrong.
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Oats are low GI, instant oats I believe are medium GI. But who would buy those fancy instant oats and not the cheap bog standard ones? Not Jack
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“No rice? Oats will do, and feel free to substitute the fish with cheap salami and the soy with any dark coloured sauce, they’re all interchangeable “
Nottonightbabe
VIP Member
Apologies, I hope it doesn't permeate your carpets
Bellybutton lint
VIP Member
chocolate choux
VIP Member
Her carpets have arthritis too
Isn't that 400% of an adults RDA for saturated fat from the coconut milk alone?
LavaFlake
VIP Member
Potentially?!
I got my username by combining two random things in my sight: a lava lamp and a chocolate flake bar!Has anyone watched that episode of Friends where Joey put his written work through a computer thesaurus and it becomes nonsensical? I get similar vibes from JM. I had to look up soliloquy in the dictionary - very accessible!
She also says she trademarked depressipes, when that TM most certainly got rejected!
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Brian Butterfield
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Before one of my bands got big, I used to handle the merch side of things. It really isn’t difficult. All you need is scales, the Royal Mail website and a bleeping printer
. And she’s sending out the same item repeatedly so she knows the weight and size. It’s extremely basic.
Harrybosch
VIP Member
Also, top tip, as we are still in the EU. You don't need to sort out customs for shipping a book to any EU country.
It's the ONLY knife I use for peeling apples.
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my_escape_from_the_ads
Chatty Member
blurstoftimes
VIP Member
Isn't that 400% of an adults RDA for saturated fat from the coconut milk alone?
So much self love and self care in gently developing blocked arteries!
You can also tell from this picture that the noodles are breaking off everywhere and clearly overcooked mush. Trying to imagine the taste of raw boiled onions, ginger and garlic mixed with a disproportionate amount of coconut milk and curry powder and TINNED FISH. I think I need a lie down.
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