Jack Monroe #11 Look for the bare depressipes, the simple bare depressipes, forget about the tattlers and your wife

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Love the new title @Harrybosch - loving the impending legal battle over copyright even more. There is very little that @PennyLoafer doesn't know about stealing intellectual property. :cool:

Look for the bare depressipes
The joyless bare depressipes
Forget about your capers and your spice!
I mean the bare depressipes
Yes, Jack Monroe's dour recipes
That aren't a real necessity of life
Wherever she argues
Wherever she moans
She has to go back to her crappy home
Matt Tebbutt's hooting with sheer glee
At being Jack-free on TV
If you don't care for the lemon bantz
Well aren't you just a fancy pants?
But if you're feeling blue
The bare depressipes of life
Will come to you
They'll come to you!


© @PennyLoafer April 27th 2020 @ 5.33pm
 
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Nottonightbabe said:
Just reading back over her tweets from this morning and see she claims she has been firefighting the media following defamatory lines of enquiry - or words to that effect... So if that is true, it could well be that the media are just reading here, rather than some of us running to them with information.
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Interesting!
Does that mean that writers for the Daily Fail and the Scum may lurk amongst us tattlers?
 
Excuse Me Laydeh! said:
If you want to grown mould then just spend five minutes in Jack's shed. You're likely to come out covered in it.
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What she needs to learn is to not say yes if you do not know. If you do not know, say so. I'm no star baker but have been baking bread a long time, including sourdough and would not use milk. Sourdough starter is water and flour. Like her bleeping slow cooker bread, she says add the salt and yeast.....well anyone that has an IQ of tinned peaches knows salt, kills yeast! I add if you add salt to the yeast at the same time.
 
Nottonightbabe said:
Just reading back over her tweets from this morning and see she claims she has been firefighting the media following defamatory lines of enquiry - or words to that effect... So if that is true, it could well be that the media are just reading here, rather than some of us running to them with information.
Click to expand...

I can’t imagine anyone from here running to the press about her revolting recipes , her rubbish internet connection , her cat or her fancy bohemian shed.

<whispers> I think she’s exaggerating just a tad.
 
Nottonightbabe said:
Just reading back over her tweets from this morning and see she claims she has been firefighting the media following defamatory lines of enquiry - or words to that effect... So if that is true, it could well be that the media are just reading here, rather than some of us running to them with information.
Click to expand...
I just don't believe anything she says. I highly doubt there's anything more happening behind the scenes other than her running out of enthusiasm for the shed cooking videos once the easy and fun job of interior design was done.
 
Saturn. said:
Love the new title @Harrybosch - loving the impending legal battle over copyright even more. There is very little that @PennyLoafer doesn't know about stealing intellectual property. :cool:

Look for the bare depressipes
The joyless bare depressipes
Forget about your capers and your spice!
I mean the bare depressipes
Yes, Jack Monroe's dour recipes
That aren't a real necessity of life
Wherever she argues
Wherever she moans
She has to go back to her crappy home
Matt Tebbutt's hooting with sheer glee
At being Jack-free on TV
If you don't care for the lemon bantz
Well aren't you just a fancy pants?
But if you're feeling blue
The bare depressipes of life
Will come to you
They'll come to you!


© @PennyLoafer April 27th 2020 @ 5.33pm
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oooooh witch you going down!
Luckily for you so are the rest of us.
 
Excuse Me Laydeh! said:
Interesting!
Does that mean that writers for the Daily Fail and the Scum may lurk amongst us tattlers?
Click to expand...


Half of the active members on Tattle right now .....


giphy.gif





..... and the other half .....


tenor.gif
 
Bellybutton lint said:
What she needs to learn is to not say yes if you do not know. If you do not know, say so. I'm no star baker but have been baking bread a long time, including sourdough and would not use milk. Sourdough starter is water and flour. Like her bleeping slow cooker bread, she says add the salt and yeast.....well anyone that has an IQ of tinned peaches knows salt, kills yeast! I add if you add salt to the yeast at the same time.
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exactly she's never even mentioned making sourdougg so why would you ask her for advice on this?!
 
Bellybutton lint said:
What she needs to learn is to not say yes if you do not know. If you do not know, say so. I'm no star baker but have been baking bread a long time, including sourdough and would not use milk. Sourdough starter is water and flour. Like her bleeping slow cooker bread, she says add the salt and yeast.....well anyone that has an IQ of tinned peaches knows salt, kills yeast! I add if you add salt to the yeast at the same time.
Click to expand...
Actually I didn't know that, (along with reasons for varying fat content in mince) but I am a rubbish and uninterested cook, and if someone gave me a tin of fruit I'd eat it with carnation milk or squirty cream. Putting in in a curry or stew would never occur to me.

Am I missing out?
 
emm said:
exactly she's never even mentioned making sourdougg so why would you ask her for advice on this?!
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Because she is so bloody arrogant she thinks she knows it all. Including how much fat in various mince.

FrumpyCat said:
Putting in in a curry or stew would never occur to me.
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I like to cook but would never add fruit to a stew. I never heard of it until the culinary delights of JM. But then again, never heard of anyone grating corn beef either.
 
There was a question about sourdough on DK and she tried to style it out but revealed she clearly knew zip. Mumbled something about “Bung it in the fridge” - err, no, only if you are maintaining an established starter. And then said something rambling about using yoghurt. And getting your kid to look after the starter instead of getting a dog. Just no.

The most clever and switched on people I know will happily admit when they haven’t a clue about something.
 
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