Erling Haaland

[wordzalad]

About time our sexy Viking robot got his own thread.

Post here whether you’re a City fan or just want to ride the Nordic meat shield or both.

Come and join the Haaland train. Choo-Choo hoes x

 

[StephenTJackson]

Thank you for making this thread for the Viking King

 

[Rita.]

In the words of John Oliver (sort of): “Step on my throat Erling Haaland, you rudely large man”

 

[Popupchick]

Yes to the viking King who can rearrange my inside with his massive

 

[StephenTJackson]

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Yes to the viking King who can rearrange my inside with his massive

He puts Grealish to shame with his short tucks.

He has such beautiful thighs, arms, abs. So beautiful, tanned, blonde. He's amazing.

 

[wordzalad]

View attachment 1606116 q

Yes to the viking King who can rearrange my inside with his massive

Split me in half King

Want him to throw me against the wall like I’m spaghetti and he’s checking to see if I’m done

 

[Popupchick]

He puts Grealish to shame with his short tucks.

He has such beautiful thighs, arms, abs. So beautiful, tanned, blonde. He's amazing.

Grealish is icky so no thanks

He's just beautiful

Split me in half King

Want him to throw me against the wall like I’m spaghetti and he’s checking to see if I’m done

I'm just gonna say I didn't know that was an actual thing until recently the spaghetti and the wall

But yes hold my neck against the wall spread my legs and take me

 

[StephenTJackson]

Split me in half King

Want him to throw me against the wall like I’m spaghetti and he’s checking to see if I’m done

He can hold me up against the wall by my throat and just duck me against the wall.

 

[wordzalad]

Oh god yes. He could lift me one handed by my throat I reckon. I’m only 5ft 2 . He could throw me about like a sheet in a strong breeze

 

[LtKit]

let's pretend that I wasn't a skeptic up until I saw him with his top off

 

[CheekyVimto99]

Fit fit fit

 

[wordzalad]

let's pretend that I wasn't a skeptic up until I saw him with his top off

The way he’s touching that award is doing things to me

 

[Popupchick]

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Fit fit fit

LOOK AT THEM NIPPLES.
Let me play with them

 

[StephenTJackson]

The way he’s touching that award is doing things to me

His fingers are definitely very talented. So long.

 

[Just Drive]

Thanks for creating this thread. City fan here, and strangely intrigued by our Viking. He is in the prawn category for me (remove the head and the rest is delicious). I am so weirdly attracted to the no-shirt-armband-on look.

 

[wordzalad]

A prawn

I think the no shirt, armband look is so attractive… I’d call him Captain whilst getting railed

Says a lot that he scored against my team and I still want to duck him .

 

[futbolista]

Thanks for creating this thread. City fan here, and strangely intrigued by our Viking. He is in the prawn category for me (remove the head and the rest is delicious). I am so weirdly attracted to the no-shirt-armband-on look.

Same girl. I love him so much. Sometimes his face scares me sometimes I think it is cute. But his body is banging. He’s like a tall tree I can climb since I’m only 5’1.

I call him Baby Viking on my IG stories and all my other football friends are tired of the two of us

He looks cute here to me

 

[CheekyVimto99]

Beaut! what a guy

 

[wordzalad]

Same girl. I love him so much. Sometimes his face scares me sometimes I think it is cute. But his body is banging. He’s like a tall tree I can climb since I’m only 5’1.

I call him Baby Viking on my IG stories and all my other football friends are tired of the two of us

He looks cute here to me

Baby Viking is so cute . I love that first one. The hair, the thighs

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Beaut! what a guy

. Wanna sit on his lap and wiggle

 

[LtKit]