Ashley James #6 Ageing like a fine wine? More like a cosmetic surgery cocktail.

[Cariad]

I really loathe the vilification of nurses / HCA / midwives / doctors via social media. They have no right of reply or any way to defend themselves.

Morale is already so low in the NHS. So-called influencer, Ashley, will do anything for engagement & sympathy. I do find her terribly precious & self-obsessed and struggle to know if anything she says is true.

Her latest narrative is this “forced” physical exam, which she seems to me alleging was an assault. There is no way to assess how labour is progressing without a digital vaginal exam, it is one of the most important tools in obstetrics.

If she couldn’t have an epidural, chances are that her labour was too far along or maybe there wasn’t an anaesthetist free as they were all busy trying to save the lives of people dying from covid or at home with covid themselves.

It’s just so weird how she seems to add more things on as time goes on. Almost as though she reads / hears about them and thinks “I had that too!” She is so false!

I do wonder if these influencers I'm looking at you Beth Sandland! think that childbirth should be all unicorns and rainbows.....it's called labour for a reason! ....you can prepare all you like but sometimes things can just get so overwhelming and birthplans can be thrown out the window!

 

[potatoface431]

9lb5 is not massive, I don’t understand. I know tiny women who have birthed bigger babies. The thing with birth is it always carries risks, you can have a mega mega low risk pregnancy but still end up having birth complications. My first birth was a breeze, I vowed to have a home birth second time with no pain relief, had an easy pregnancy, no reason at all for any complications. Ended up being blue lighted to hospital and had all the drugs going. I am thankful my son was born healthy and absolutely fine although it was far from the birth experience I had hoped for.
I know people do have traumatic births, but I really think Ashley just uses it for content sadly.

 

[aggytha]

Since when was Alf an abnormally large baby?!

I am 5’1, a size 6 and had a baby on the 90th centile! And I have never considered that I may be too boney for my daughter to sleep on me the only issue I’ve ever had is lowering her into her cot as she got older, as I didn’t have the physical strength or height to be able to do it without waking her Ashley is absolutely pathetic. Any excuse to get out of parenting.

I of course believe everyone should be able to access pain relief as quickly as possible in labour if they so wish, but surely she realises that there were women who potentially needed an anaesthetist more urgently than her? I had a lady joke to me on the postnatal ward that I was the reason she couldn’t have an epidural as I was rushed in for an emergency caesarean after a 70 hour labour

It’s not my place to say whether I think she’s suffered from birth trauma or not, but speaking from personal experience… I was not able to physically function until I had requested all of my medical notes and had a debrief and understanding of what happened with my birth. I personally find it odd she’s waited this long.

 

[Lala1231]

I do wonder if these influencers I'm looking at you Beth Sandland! think that childbirth should be all unicorns and rainbows.....it's called labour for a reason! ....you can prepare all you like but sometimes things can just get so overwhelming and birthplans can be thrown out the window!

B.S was who came to my mind as well they are very similar in their motherhood posts

 

[Dicky Tum]

Her labour was soooo traumatic and her stitching was sooo bad that she was up taking photos of herself 2 hours after giving birth. I remember it being on the Daily Mail at the time and I went back to check - she definitely posted photos that she claims were 2 hours after. She spouts so much BS I don't know what to believe

I don't know about anyone else, but after my first long labour with bad stitching, it was a good few hours before I could even stand, let alone get to a bathroom mirror, clean myself up and get yet another photo of myself in my underwear

 

[willowtree2]

So bleeping bored of her shouting about him being 9.5lbs. I’m not dismissing it as small but it’s still within the national average! Just on the larger end! I birthed an 11.5lbs whopper AND I had late scans. Scans cannot give you an accurate weight/size of your baby and if you think that you’re stupid. She’s stupid.

 

[Cariad]

She's been reading here again!...
I'm not sure birth can ever said to be dignified!
of course there are instances where you have don't have general anaesthetic in surgery, you numpty! ....hell you can even have facelifts without general anaesthetic
my 78 year old mum had joint replacement surgery for both her rheumatoid arthritic knees as well as most of her fingers joints ( which I think you'll agree is pretty traumatic for someone her age) ....she didn't have general anaesthesia for any of these surgeries
oh and btw Ashley men have vasectomies under local anaesthetic!
she obviously didn't do her research regarding childbirth

 

[ketchupmayo17]

If she’s ‘more than’ just your ‘mum friend’ why didn’t you just say - ‘went to the park with my friend’ ??? always meeting trouble half way.

Also she used the wrong ‘there’ - thought she was an A grade student

 

[moimoi]

She's been reading here again!...
I'm not sure birth can ever said to be dignified!
of course there are instances where you have don't have general anaesthetic in surgery, you numpty! ....hell you can even have facelifts without general anaesthetic
my 78 year old mum had joint replacement surgery for both her rheumatoid arthritic knees as well as most of her fingers joints ( which I think you'll agree is pretty traumatic for someone her age) ....she didn't have general anaesthesia for any of these surgeries
oh and btw Ashley men have vasectomies under local anaesthetic!
she obviously didn't do her research regarding childbirth
View attachment 1360159 q

Hi Ashley, I had a traumatic birth last year and it was under general anaesthetic for a category 1 emergency c-section where my baby and I nearly died. I didn’t get to meet him for 4 hours after as I was still completely out of it and definitely did not have the ability to take photos of myself for insta 2 hours after! And there are lots of people who have had it far, far worse than me. She’s literally just clinging on to any type of ‘relatable’ pregnancy content and clearly booking the birth debrief for content. Pathetic woman.

 

[ILoveCrispSandwiches]

I wonder about Ashley, I told my mum that I was considering not having children but was unsure.

She told me quite honestly the difficulties she and my dad had when I was born. Her life completely changed as my Dad worked away all the time and she wasn’t naturally maternal.

She was honest about how big a change it made to her life but how much she loves us now!

I respected her for having this conversation when I was old enough to understand.

I don’t think it would have been so easy to see her instagramming every negative thought to the public as I was growing up and I wouldn’t want to know them either.

There are some positives on A’s feed but I don’t think these will be the ones her son remembers in the future. I hope she considers this at some point.

 

[oceanblu]

Jesus Christ will this woman ever be happy?!

Newsflash Ashley… birth is traumatic! Get the duck over it! You should be more concerned with the fact you keep ignoring your smear! Does she really think a c section would have been the easier option for pain?? Wow she would NOT have handled that recovery if she’d had a cesarean! What a complete melt!

 

[Barvin]

General anaesthesia might sound good to her but it is quite awful actually when it comes to childbirth. Me and my baby could have died so had to have an emergency C-section under GA. It took hours to bring me around, I couldn’t do skin to skin, have no memory of the first 24-hours…it was a mess and in my case very much the fault of the midwives/doctors. It was hugely traumatic and I couldn’t function without the debrief to get some clarity and understanding. It’s awful to use something like that for engagement. There’s a difference between what she’s doing and raising awareness/advocating for better care during labour

 

[grumpy-nosy-cow]

Jesus Christ will this woman ever be happy?!

Newsflash Ashley… birth is traumatic! Get the duck over it! You should be more concerned with the fact you keep ignoring your smear! Does she really think a c section would have been the easier option for pain?? Wow she would NOT have handled that recovery if she’d had a cesarean! What a complete melt!

she definitely wouldnt have coped with the dreaded c section overhang belly either!

 

[Erzxo]

she definitely wouldnt have coped with the dreaded c section overhang belly either!

Yeah, but it would give her content forevermore...

 

[willowtree2]

After that photo of her posing/smiling with mascara down her face, which is NOT from tears. I genuinely think she’s unwell or just fucked up from Instagram. Her eyes aren’t puffy or red, she has literally smeared it slightly for content about gynaecological issues and wanting sympathy cos she was the only one to have a baby in lockdown with a very bleeping stretched and exhausted NHS. Who the duck does that???

When I had my son at the 2nd peak we sat with our midwives, they asked if we minded if they took their masks off to chat and hold baby then broke down to us about the pandemic and the conditions they were working under. I was left to labour on my own for a day and evening, they refused to examine me and there are things I could complain about but my baby is here safe and well.

I just wish she’d shut up slagging the NHS off!!

 

[sasbeep]

If she had a c section she would be the exact same situation but would be banging on about why her birth led to a section, why a section was forced on her, why she couldn’t have a drug free ~natural~ birth like her birth plan.

 

[ketchupmayo17]

‘I begged for a c section’ - yet again showing herself to be the ignorant fool she is. Enforcing and spreading the myth that c section is ‘easier’. She has NO idea how traumatic it can be, especially when classed as an emergency, not to mention the recovery

mark my words, this is the beginning of her bagging a planned caesarean for her next one, on the grounds she’s emotionally/psychologically scarred from the previous one. (Similar to what Kate lawler did)

 

[Eyeofthetiger]

I bet she wants a section to take pics in her underwear with the scar to show off the trauma womens bodies go through with pregnancy and birth. The mental trauma she’s piling on Alf is disgusting

 

[Stewart123]

I think some of the comments here are a little unfair. I had a fairly traumatic birth and lost a lot of blood. I also had a very long recovery and my experience and the feelings around it shouldn’t be invalidated just because other people have had it worse. I didn’t do a birth debrief until my child was nearly a year old as I wanted to bury my head in the sand and pretend that I was fine. It wasn’t until I completely broke down sobbing during my smear that I realised I had a problem and was referred for a debrief. And of course I’m grateful that my child is healthy. But loving your child and being traumatised by their birth are not mutually exclusive things.

 

[Jaybtee]

Alf has been so behind compared to the cousin (not walking, talking or sleeping in a routine) that she’s thinking of ways to make him appear more advanced and developed. Potty training he’s never in a million years old enough to be potty trained.