Ashley James #23 Now that I have baby Thumb, sorry Alf the iPad is your Mum.

[Lurker121]

It is mad how little she has to do with Alf now. I mean, I know she’s been like this as soon as he stopped breastfeeding but now Ada is here she literally does NOTHING for him/with him. She must have said to Tommy when baby girl arrives you must take FULL responsibility for Alf. He’s in childcare as soon as it opens until it closes too, you’d think his mum had a full on, important job but no she just creates tit content for Instagram. She’s a cold, heartless witch.

 

[Cady1954]

She has got to be the vainest most pointless person on Instagram and that's saying a lot. And put that bleeping kid down.

 

[willowtree2]

LOVELY DAY XX

Alf was a little picky at lunch time but ate well at snack time just incase anyones desperate to know xx

 

[Larahk]

For the love of God put the baby down!!!!!!!!!! Honest to God, no baby needs to be held 24/7, it’s ludicrous!! Also most second time mum’s are are so careful to make sure that the older child doesn’t feel like they’ve lost their mummy to the new baby…..not our Trashley clearly! Poor Alf just has to watch his mum constantly holding Baby Ad!

This is such a good point!! I forgot that I always tried to make sure I had arms free for toddler cuddles as much as possible, especially in those early weeks as it's such a huge change for them. Alf has been cast aside completely and has to watch his mum constantly holding baby Ad.

 

[littlepup]

This is such a good point!! I forgot that I always tried to make sure I had arms free for toddler cuddles as much as possible, especially in those early weeks as it's such a huge change for them. Alf has been cast aside completely and has to watch his mum constantly holding baby Ad.

And when she was listing the things she could do if she wasn’t back at work it was being with #Ad, classes, meeting people for lunch. Not spend more time with Alf, help develop their relationship, his relationship with #Ad; just no mention of Alf.
I understand people want to keep routine but he could’ve dropped a few hours from childcare if she was home so she could devote some time to him. If she can get herself ready and made-up #Ad has to be put down at some point.
He’s been returning from childcare to his beloved Nanas who’d spent the day with #Ad, were there because of her, not picked up by or had any 1-2-1 time with his Mum for 7 weeks. And now he can’t even get close to her. Poor boy.

But it’s alright because she bought him a pram as a gift from the baby.

 

[shovemytitsinyourface]

Is she wanting sympathy for such a hard working day? Does she want thanks for that reel? She’s an absolute parody

Such hard work

 

[willowtree2]

And when she was listing the things she could do if she wasn’t back at work it was being with #Ad, classes, meeting people for lunch. Not spend more time with Alf, help develop their relationship, his relationship with #Ad; just no mention of Alf.
I understand people want to keep routine but he could’ve dropped a few hours from childcare if she was home so she could devote some time to him. If she can get herself ready and made-up #Ad has to be put down at some point.
He’s been returning from childcare to his beloved Nanas who’d spent the day with #Ad, were there because of her, not picked up by or had any 1-2-1 time with his Mum for 7 weeks. And now he can’t even get close to her. Poor boy.

But it’s alright because she bought him a pram as a gift from the baby.

Such a heartbreaking perspective She said she couldn’t do classes with Alf cos she was back to work but hang on, we were in lockdown? No mention of that, only when it suits her excuse! As much as Tommy creeps me out thank god Alf has him and NNB. They both dote on him so he gets love from somewhere.

 

[Jjsb]

"But it’s alright because she bought him a pram as a gift from the baby."

She didnt even buy the pram, it was "gifted"

 

[lemmings2000]

Baby girl can't be that much of a dream baby if she doesn't sleep anywhere but on Ash? With my second we gave into her sleeping on us for a few weeks but then really tried with gentle techniques to get her to sleep in moses basket so we could spend more time with our first. ( even if it was just 20 mins)

You know she will be like, oh guys, I'm getting lots of negative messages about baby girl sleeping on me, I'm doing attachment parent and using my "instincts"
Blah blah blah rant moan....got my hair and make up done for a reel of me holding my baby.

 

[ooh scandalous]

The fact she calls it a “struggle” means this bubble is about to burst, cue the tearful stories in a few weeks about how hard it all is, it’s ok to not be ok, blah blah blah.
Ashley, for your own well-being and Alf’s, put that bloody baby in a crib. Give her a dummy if you must, swaddle her, turn up the white noise. She might protest a bit but she’ll soon be fine. I only really held my second born for breastfeeds in the early weeks, the rest of the time she was peacefully asleep in her Moses basket. It didn’t feel like I had 2 kids until a few months later, because I could still give pretty much the same attention and time to my first born given the circumstances.
no doubt behind the scenes Alf is displaying some very challenging behaviour in response.

 

[Raa]

The length of time Alf is in childcare is really sad considering she just fannys about AND she’s often late picking him up. Give Alf some one to one time for gods sake

 

[Micernice]

And when she was listing the things she could do if she wasn’t back at work it was being with #Ad, classes, meeting people for lunch. Not spend more time with Alf, help develop their relationship, his relationship with #Ad; just no mention of Alf.
I understand people want to keep routine but he could’ve dropped a few hours from childcare if she was home so she could devote some time to him. If she can get herself ready and made-up #Ad has to be put down at some point.
He’s been returning from childcare to his beloved Nanas who’d spent the day with #Ad, were there because of her, not picked up by or had any 1-2-1 time with his Mum for 7 weeks. And now he can’t even get close to her. Poor boy.

But it’s alright because she bought him a pram as a gift from the baby.

Not only is this sad for Alf now, but could also impact him when he's older. Feelings of rejection from such a young age alongside probable feelings of sibling rivalry cant be good. I appreciate newborns are time consuming especially if you are breastfeeding but she's giving nothing to Alf. Not great for Tommy either if Ash is not letting him hold or bond with Ada.

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

I’m still not up to date properly with the thread or with Trashley, and I do absolutely agree with everyone that she should be making time for Alf.

But.

I need to say that some babies do just need to be held. I had one of those babies. He couldn’t be put down because he screamed in pain and it took a long time to work out why.

Ash shouldn’t be demonstrating unsafe sleep on a public platform.

She shouldn’t be moaning about how she ‘has’ to work with Ada there (because that’s her choice to be working so soon).

And it’s awful how she has moaned non-stop about Alf needing feeding hourly and how hard that was, when Princess Ad is actually more ‘needy’ but that’s apparently fine.

Some babies just need to be held.
And that’s okay.

There will be people reading feeling like they are doing the wrong thing by holding their baby, so this is a reminder that the posts on here are only ever about Ashley.

She has people who could hold Ada and give her a break. But they wouldn’t make such good content.

 

[rockhoppernroll]

Totally agree @InTheDollsHouse.
Both my babies were constantly held and also both refluxy (hey we all predicted this is yet to come, right?!). I love the newborn phase and the cuddles.

BUT with the second one, she had to be held a bit by her dad and anyone else who was there to help, so I could spend vital 1:1 time with my first. WITHOUT THE BABY THERE. Ash just doesn’t seem to get this part. The importance of still doing things like bedtime (alone if possible, sometimes with bouncer if husband still at work etc). We still had no end of jealousy issues etc.

 

[Mousejen]

I have worked hard to carve out time with my son to make sure that he doesn't feel left out now he's not my only child - that might be reading with him while I'm feeding or it might be playing with the cars or balls while the baby is in the bouncer or napping (at 9 weeks old my youngest has just started letting me put her down for a nap, we might not get long but I take any opportunity I can). Ashley seems far more interested in taking trips in to London to shoot for last minute projects and trying to justify her choices (including her taxes being overdue).
I definitely could have done without her underwear photo yesterday, another reminder for me that I haven't 'bounced back' after my baby was born, and I know that's a multi faceted thing and comparing myself to someone else generally isn't helpful but that's easier said than done.

 

[JarvisCockerSpaniel]

The childminder’s lack of punctuation always makes me chuckle. ‘Chicken grapes’ ‘little salmon blueberries’ but it would drive me nuts if I had to decipher it every day

 

[LT2201]

Of course Alf wasn't "feeling" getting photos done so he's only in one, it just suits her narrative of everything being perfect. Ad is the baby she wanted in the first place, never Alfie. She just made do with him until the blessed baby girl came along. And its just convenient for her that she can't put her down, creates another barrier to keep Alf away. Poor Alf.

 

[willowtree2]

‘Alf wasn’t feeling it so we let him go ’
‘I think I look so nice’

Who put 2p in the head this morning?

Absolutley agree @InTheDollsHouse. Mine wouldn’t be put down, lived in the sling BUT I doted on my toddler. It could be that Ada has silent reflux or allergies if she’s that unsettled but I’m guessing the telepathy hasn’t kicked in yet to let Ash know. Also she just doesn’t want to put her down or give Alf the time of day.

 

[Elle055]

Nope. Don't buy it.

"Guys, I've got it... you know who we should get to DJ on the Coronation weekend? Ashley James! I can't think of anyone better to push that little button in time to the music whilst simultaneously sticking her tongue out like a woman possessed. Such a talent!"

 

[rawbin30]

I’m still not up to date properly with the thread or with Trashley, and I do absolutely agree with everyone that she should be making time for Alf.

But.

I need to say that some babies do just need to be held. I had one of those babies. He couldn’t be put down because he screamed in pain and it took a long time to work out why.

Ash shouldn’t be demonstrating unsafe sleep on a public platform.

She shouldn’t be moaning about how she ‘has’ to work with Ada there (because that’s her choice to be working so soon).

And it’s awful how she has moaned non-stop about Alf needing feeding hourly and how hard that was, when Princess Ad is actually more ‘needy’ but that’s apparently fine.

Some babies just need to be held.
And that’s okay.

There will be people reading feeling like they are doing the wrong thing by holding their baby, so this is a reminder that the posts on here are only ever about Ashley.

She has people who could hold Ada and give her a break. But they wouldn’t make such good content.

Completely agree. Even if babies don’t “need” to be held, aka they are quite content in a crib etc, it’s still so beneficial to hold and cuddle little babies! Closeness is what babies’ brains are biologically wired for.
(Still hate Ash- this is for other people thinking they need to put their babies down “just because”).