Alfie Deyes #5 What a ducking moron!

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Oohthedrama said:
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"They say if I stare at my nose long enough, I'll get crossed eye.. wonder if they'll stay that way"
 
Oohthedrama said:
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He’s probably looking at a donut in a shop window display.
My caption for anything to do with Alfie on twitter.
“Oh duck right off”
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'Guys I have just discovered something licherally sick and super exciting. When I looked in the mirror at my savage hoodie the words and letters were licherally completely different. They didn't say Futures Elf AT ALL. Guys I'm thinking it might be a secret code or something. Should I make a new conspiracy vid about it?'
 
jammy said:
What happened to his bestie Chai? Seems he's a full-time Twitch streamer now but doesn't look like he's one of the boyz these days?
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Wow I totally forgot about this guy. Where did he go? He seemed more palatable than the Steves and seans. ...or maybe I'm just looking back with rose tinted glasses.
 
Oohthedrama said:
@GossWhore i came here to post this [emoji1787][emoji1787]
I don’t know if I’m more disturbed by the fact that this is the most romantic picture I’ve seen on Alfie grid in a long time,
Or by Zoe’s hand reaching up from the floor trying to break up this special moment. [emoji849]
I assume she’s in the dog bed and isn’t allowed on the furniture.
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I'm more disturbed that you seem to be living in my head and not paying me rent [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] We really are the same witch but Forreal BBHMM
 
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Just get a life Alfie. Do something, anything, just something vaguely interesting. Nobody cares about your puzzles and kendamas specially ordered from the US (another hobby that has gone out the window, because they haven’t been seen in months) or any other crap you buy to try and pretend to be quirky and edgy by buying stuff that isn’t mainstream. It’s all so fake. He doesn’t actually have any hobbies or interests, nothing to define him as a person.
 
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I swear I would have him under that water in a heartbeat if I was poppy and I saw this online.
What is she doing with those glasses is this a joke 😐
She’s being paid to “influence” and I’m gonna be harsh here... I’m not inspired poppy, I’m not inspired 😐
I’m not clicking anything that she’s swiping or linking.
She looks like Alfie’s mum and Alfie looks like a gurning teenage sitting with his mum for a family photo.
 
Haha he’s too scared to skateboard. Motor biking won’t last long

Does he think he’s some documentary maker now?

Is he pretending Logan Paul invited him to some charity day but he can’t make it?? I’m confused. There’s no way Logan invited him. Lichee ally anything to include Logan’s name in his vlog.


Alfie thinking he’s more athletic than Logan is bleeping hilarious

He said he was too busy and couldn’t go
Then said he would go if he can do under 12 seconds.

Which one is it? He won’t ever do anything that might make him look bad, but actually consistantly makes himself look awful

Walked into that running track expecting some huge welcome party because Alfred has entered the building. His ego is off the Richter scale

As usual, Alfie thinks throwing money into expensive gear will make him better
 
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Moreteaplease said:
He couldn’t even keep up with Zoe’s running.. he was massively out of breath but now he claims to be some amazing runner? Ok Alfie, ok.
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He did four lots of 100m sprints over a fairly big space of time... ten minute breaks in between and was totally wiped out. It was all the water he’d drunk.

He wasn’t even running the right distance?!? Every blog he loses a brain cell I’m sure

Wowwwwwwwww said:
Talks pure tit! Logan would wipe the floor with him.
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If you mentioned Alfred to Logan he’d probably be like who???
Oh that geeky kid that sat in the corner on his own blogging at the boxing match

He knows Logan will wipe the floor with him hence he’s already making excuses. He’d probably deliberately break his ankle on the skate ramp just to get out of it. He does still have a skate ramp doesn’t he?? Only I’ve not seen him skate it once yet??
 
"I can show you video of me leapin over 5 lorries on Blue Peter if you like" is all I heard and the image of Jay running that motorbike straight into the wall on Inbetweeners is all that came to mind when I saw the first couple mins of the new video. Such a try hard, and always failing. Everything is always total bull. And I get so embarrassed for him when he's nervously cackling to somene new about a topic he knows nothing of.🥴


He says " That guy was so lovely, love when people have a business and they're so passionate about what they do".. wish that could be you huh? too bad Alf.
 
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