Niomi Smart (born May 26, 1992) is a social media influencer that was known for (talking about) being vegan and sustainable. She is no longer vegan and no longer pretending to be sustainable, jetitng off on holiday every week.
Niomi Smart rose to YouTube fame around 2014 as the then-girlfriend of Marcus Butler, a prominent member of the original "Brit Crew," which also included Zoe Sugg, Tanya Burr, Joe Sugg, Jim Chapman, Alfie Deyes, Caspar Lee, and others. At that time, Niomi was managed by Gleam Futures, alongside the other Brit Crew members. Gleam developed a "sustainable" and "plant-based" persona for Niomi, which she successfully leveraged over the years, even "writing" and publishing a recipe book titled *Eat Smart*. Prior to becoming an influencer, she graduated from the University of the West of England with a Bachelor of Laws degree (in 2013).
Niomi ended her relationship with Marcus toward the end of 2015, and she moved to a new home in January 2016. By then, she had already built a substantial following on YouTube and Instagram and was frequently collaborating with major brands.
Later in 2016, Niomi revealed her new boyfriend, Joe Woodward, the son of Clive Woodward (former coach of the England Rugby team). The couple was introduced by Niomi’s (former) best friend Charlotte and soon began dating. Joe's nicknames on Tattle are DJ or Dreamy Joey. They got engaged in December 2019, but Joe ended the engagement in August 2020. The last known post with Joey was "pizza night". A while later, she was seen with a guy we named Dettol Daddy (Thread #10, thread #11).
In October 2020, Niomi launched a skincare company called Smart Skin. Launch video can be watched here. She announced in January 2024 that Smart Skin was shut down in 2023.
In September 2021, she moved into her newly purchased home, which Tattle refers to as "The Shed". She had plans of getting permits of converting the unusable upstairs into a bedroom, but the permits were denied. Less than a year later, in July 2022, she posted a video where she talked about regretting buying the house, and also about the pressure she felt to have accomplishments by 30.
In 2021, she began dating personal trainer Bradley Simmonds (nicknamed Forky for eating sushi with a fork). The forky relationship provided a lot of quality content, for example: the iconic Lost in the Jungle. Niomi and Forky were on holiday in Mauritius and went on a hike, where they got separated from their guide and were posting instagram stories about being lost. They had to be rescued by special forces, which Forky mistakenly kept referring to as the "secret service".
After ending her relationship with Forky, she went on a month-long trip to Bali, where she met Jamie White (nicknamed Lordon, for misspelling London on an instagram story). They got engaged, but then Niomi deleted all photos of him and broke off the engagement, announcing it in this Hello Magazine article. We dubbed this The Lordon Extinction Event.
Soon after, Tattle detectives deduced (from an obscure photo of an airport runway) that Niomi was in fact visiting him in South Africa, where he was loitering after the breakup. Within a short time, Niomi started wearing her engagement ring again (proclaimed by them to be their “star”) and unarchived some of their previously hidden Instagram photos. Pretty detailed article about the whole thing can be found by searching for Daily Mail "Influencer Niomi Smart announces she's reconciled with her ex-fiancé - almost three months after their shock split".
About 6 moths later, on November 22, 2024, they unfollowed each other on Instagram (or more likely Niomi blocked him). She posted Instagram stories about leaving Bali and "savoring every moment as best she could". More info can be found in "2nd breakup" section.
Glossary
Big Tezza - grandma Dettol Daddy - Niomi's briefest fling after DJ. He was a marketing manager for Dettol from South Africa. Dreamy Joey (DJ) - The gold standard of Niomi's partners Forky - personal trainer Bradley Simmonds Lordon - Niomi's current fiancé Nimsplaining(verb) - 1. To be blind to the irrelevant and unrelatable privilege of your own experiences, while condescendingly advising people who experience real difficulty, hardship, suffering or pain that they can overcome said circumstances merely through vague self belief and/or partaking in increasingly bizarre facsimiles of culturally-appropriated practices. 2. To write a lengthy, rambling spiel in which you attempt to appear enlightened, while revealing yourself to be ignorant and idiotic. (source: @Hannah Banana) The Shed - the "house" Niomi impulsively purchased right before turning 30. She talks about regretting the purchase in this video.
Marcus Butler
Niomi's first known boyfriend. Their fans referred to them as "Narcus".
SourcedBox
They had a shared business venture together called SourcedBox, which was a subscription box of "healthy" snacks (launched in June 2015). After the breakup, they awkwardly continued SourcedBox together. SourcedBox made its last instagram post on April 3, 2019, and the company was officially dissolved on September 7, 2021.
Marcus Breakup Announcement (reupload)
Niomi's moving out from Marcus vlog
Where Niomi is very giddy, happy, and excited (in contrast to Marcus during this time). It is widely believed that she dumped him.
Marcus talks about restrictive eating
After the breakup with Niomi, Marcus frequently talked about his struggles with restrictive eating. Example from June 2016:
In this video, he also says he's "only learned [how to be balanced] like 6 months ago", which would mean January 2016 (immediately after his breakup with Niomi).
Dreamy Joey
Grans Moving in with Joe Card
Before the breakup with Joe
After the breakup with Joe
When Joe wanted toast and didn't want a feel new tea
She freaked out over him not wanting her favourite tea while on camera and had to put the tea bag back in the box
And seconds later it got worse when he meekly said he wanted toast
Niomi's new boyfriend-life coach without any certification / professional brainwasher is named Jamie White. He used to promote events called "Knickers for liquors" in Ireland where young women have free drinks if they give their panties. The events were held at a club where a girl was sexually assaulted three months prior.
Jamie White, which ran the promotion, said the offer is an example of “more exciting things to come,” told papers including the Evening Herald that there’d been no complaints from locals and the Rape Crisis Centre was “wrong” to say it was exploitative. (@news.pollstar)
His website also posted a "step by step guide for one night stand" giving instructions on how to get a woman drunk in order to have sex with her (thanks to SydneyBarrett for the details)
We call him Lordon because he can't spell London!
Fun Times at the Beach
They went to the beach in early May around Lordon’s birthday, and had a good frolicking. It was there that he became known as the chinless wonder.
It has yet to be confirmed by either party, but as of this writing, Niomi has taken down these photos and reels of her once-beloved, with more to come eventually. This will be updated accordingly.
In November 2024, Tattlers observed the sporadic appearance and disappearance of "the star" (her engagement ring).
On November 1st, she makes a yoga class post on instagram, and starts receiving comments like "she's back full power❤" and lots of red hearts from people she follows. She "hearts" all these comments.
Around Nov 18, she makes a "recent musings" post, where someone comments "i have a bad vibe about your fiance. Hope you are ok". Niomi leaves the comment up, and "hearts" other comments of people asking her to come back to the UK on the same post. Niomi makes a comment saying "I'm home soon." even though she's been calling Bali her home for months. Mimiikonn makes a comment "Sending you so much love ♥", after not having commented for years. Big Tezza leaves two heart emojis on the same post, which she does every time Niomi has a breakup. At this point, Tattle grows more suspicious that things are over between Niomi and Lordon.
As this is all going on, Lordon starts actively posting Instagram stories daily, in one of which he tags the location as "Home ♥ Sweet ♥ Home", showcasing the Bali villa, which he was [previously] sharing with Niomi. Presumably, he is implying that his home is in Bali. Remember that at this exact time, Niomi is making comments that her home is in the UK. This is a chronic source of tension in their relationship.
On November 22, 2024, Tattlers discover that they are no longer following each other on Instagram and their likes have disappeared from each other's posts, so one of them must have blocked the other (unclear who). Niomi posts the following stories the same day:
Sustainability Queen
Boots Collab
In September 2018, Niomi revealed that she is launching a line of products (random plastic shit wrapped in more plastic) that would be sold in Boots. She received a lot of negative feedback from her subscribers for the products going completely against her "sustainable" ethos. Launch video and comments can be seen here.
Sustainable Landrover
Family
The Library
Frequently mentioned book wallpaper in her mom's house
Gleam Futures
Gleam was the influencer management company of Niomi and other Britcrew members. Dominic Smales was the CEO and founder of Gleam. He can be seen in many Brit Crew vlogs (for example, here and here). Currently, the company is in the state of liquidation.
