The Chateau Diaries #309 Stephanie wastes money on the garden, the chapel, the boyfriend - all useless!

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ComtesseRose

ComtesseRose

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Congratulations @Lady Avonlea for naming the thread, an honourable mention goes to @Just Grift Wood the words came from your post. I had to be a bit creative with the limited space.

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T Rex
VIP Member
Tuesday at 4:50 AM
Lady Avonlea said:
Hire a trained architect and skilled restorers for €500,000 to properly renovate your chapel, but then Fanny doesn’t spend a bit more to hire a licensed electrician and lighting expert to design and layout the electrical and light fittings. Also, shouldn’t you be running the electrical conduit before you do the plastering and painting?

Fanny really does want the place to burn down, claim the insurance and escape to Venice. I hope Fanny’s insurance company is watching boy wonder play with the electrical layout.
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As an electrical engineer, I agree- the electrics should have been put in place first by a qualified electrician before the plastering was done (as it would have made sense.) The whole Shitoo itself screams of old electrics (remember the live wire Ian the Plasterer, RIP, found in the turret?) That, paired with the leaky kitchen ceiling "tee he, the can lights don't work, but we can't be arsed with that when there are antiques and wallpaper to buy!" are a disaster. Snorts is barely qualified to dress himself, let alone decide on the electric placement for the chapel. One could literally hang a Hello Kitty lunchbox on the wall and convince these clowns it is an electrical panel. SMH.

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Just Grift Wood
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Tuesday at 6:48 PM
@wellnone9367
4 hours ago
Phillip, you are a wonder - quietly squirreling away there in the background, getting all the important groundwork done for what will be gorgeous chapel lighting. I really do admire your tenacity and perseverance with chateau decorative detail, never content until all the furniture and trimmings have been moved about six times, and every space is perfect. SOME might call it anal - LOL - but I think it is marvellous, such an art.

@AvonLady-1337
4 hours ago
I hope there are some glamorous photoshoots in the newly refurbished chapel. I liked the one a few years ago with the models in leather!

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Iolair
VIP Member
Monday at 10:40 PM
Pekey said:
Morning all !

Just started to watch CD.

OMG Squirrel is actually Working pitting some cherries - next he will be peeling some grapes !! 😱
Then a lie down. 😴
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Phillip actually working? He needs to calm the duck down and take a step away!
I'm looking into essential oils for him. What's that one that helps people calm down?
Chloroform? It's chloroform isn't it?!

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UvulaDonor
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Saturday at 7:15 AM
How can she on the one hand claim patreon money is strictly for renovations and yet on the other hand claim its a lifestyle vlog so it's okay if no reno is getting done?

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Just Grift Wood
VIP Member
Saturday at 11:59 AM
Ghastly, ghastly, ghastly old foreskin flapping around CFS like a one trick pony screeching and pretending to be a presenter. Look at me everyone it rained so I bought a ridiculous tail coat so everyone look at me!!! She truly is an abomination, drops money on a garden she never goes into and a chapel she doesn't care about and on a boyfriend she has never fucked. A face and lips so full of fillers that is enough to stare at. She so desperately wants a TV career and can't understand why it hasn't happened.

Pube is a vacation from taste. Those hideous sculptures of piglet and poo were so twee and naff, but the petulant little liver lipped fag thought dropping 20k of grifted money would be nothing. He is a bleeping nightmare and CD is a freak show.

The meal at home at the end you could tell Amaury was made to be there, she is desperate to portray the place as a haven of love and laughter but really she is like Kathy Bates in Misery holding them all captive to play along with her phoney narrative. Surely this living display of hell has to end soon, surely the blind will see what a bloody nasty little con witch she is.

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T Rex
VIP Member
Sunday at 5:11 AM
JulesWake said:
Agree with everything you mentioned regarding a total make-over. However if she's rotten on the inside, none of that will change her appearance. She needs to work on her soul, become a caring person, enriching other people's lives, not just her own. Although that probably will not happen, she only reflects on her latest purchase; as everything with Stephanie is just surface. An absolute waste of life, & what she could accomplish, with all that she has at her disposal. Life is about helping other people & trying to make a difference. jmho
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I do think Fanny is beyond help, sadly. She lacks empathy and humility- as no matter how hard she fell, someone was always there to bail her out. Michael Petherick was the one who encouraged her to make a vlog on YT- and while he has his own issues, Fanny could have been a better friend to him. If my friend was making shyte choices, I certainly would have booked a ticket there to put a stop to that BS and have a "Coming to Jesus" talk. No, she couldn't be arsed, as it wasn't about her- she could give two forks about her "best friend" when she was starting to gain traction on YT. That was really shyte of her- while TeaBag has his issues, he was a genuine friend. Without him, she's still be struggling in her crappy B&B to pay the electrics... Fanny just uses people. What has she done for her local community? Abso-ferking-lutely NOTHING!

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T Rex
VIP Member
Saturday at 5:03 AM
Lady Avonlea said:
Snorty purchased 2 lambswool sweaters - pink and mauve ($289.00 each), 2 pairs of high waisted trousers - blue and beige ($398.00 each, and 1 new lightweight collarless shirt ($277.00 each). Snorty purchased $1,700 in clothes at the Carrier Company UK shop. Here Marie - enjoy using this $103.00 flower tote that stays at the shitoo after you leave.
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I don't understand Fanny at all- it was like a combination of a terrible belated birthday present and "Here's something to make your work more efficient- you're welcome!" while they spent gobs of money on their own shopping sprees, all while moaning how much the chateau renovations cost. How about a thoughtful gift for a change? Maybe FRK would have liked a lovely cashmere jumper as well (not from the Carrier Company UK) to keep warm in the hovel that lacks heat. I mean, she was still wearing her Christmas jumper a few months ago (which Fanny mocked her for) to stay warm. Sadness.

While I don't think Dingo Grunt and FRK are anything more than friends, I do believe they are kind to one another. Of course, Fanny tried to create drama about showing the note FRK left him that the books could go into the boxes to lead the "sheeple" to believe something untoward is going on to deflect the valid questions her viewers are asking about her holidays and shopping sprees . Fanny is a mean girl.

Ironically, I purchased a grey cashmere jumper from Sam's Club (the US big box store) for $30 almost 20 years ago. Member's Mark brand, and yes, I am a bad person who has washed it on the delicate cycle in the washing machine and put it in the dryer on low. It has been my basic beyatch travel companion for years and years- I wear it on airplanes, I wear it in the Winter, I wear it everywhere. Classic, timeless, and it STILL is in good nick. It has held up far better than any other expensive cashmere jumper I have ever purchased. Snorts' $300 jumper is new, and already looks like it needs to be binned.

Last edited: Saturday at 5:17 AM
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And the Patreon vlog



Today at 3:20 PM
This morning's Patreon vlog:

  • Poor Lancelot feels very poorly due to car sickness, but the gruesome twosome only care that he vomited on their precious car interior;
  • Permasmile arranged a bachelor/bachelorette Alice in Wonderland themed catered dinner;
  • Plans are made to go shopping - surprise!
  • The gay fiancee is an alcoholic;
  • The mean girl is not amused that all attention is on Sara and Steve;
  • The grifter can't stand that the twit kept something secret from her;
  • Sara is gifted cocks;
  • The con woman delights in sharing Steve's private medical information.
fp.jpg

Free Lancelot
The Chateau Diaries is a scam
Stephanie Jarvis and Philip Janssen are cons

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As always, thank you all who contribute
Remember we have a wiki
Happy Tattling
 
New thread on a Thursday night… 🥳 so exciting, it feels like Friday night… thank you @ComtesseRose

Now let’s get serious… I carefully analyzed the images you all shared, from the party Chez The Permaslimeys, thrown around the newly engaged Shreks. That group of people, both engaged couples (sic) and their hostesses, are all quite repulsive.

Foolish idiots with a very bad taste and even worse attitude. What a horrific group of “friends” really, the entire thing was vomit inducing ridiculous… Tiaras? Cocks? Theme party? Oh please, give me a break, those two are well over 50’s years old.

Maybe I am too much of a cold hearted witch but thank goodness those type of bachelor and bachelorette parties are not, were not, a thing around here… maybe these days there are something like that going here too, not that I have heard of, but with growing influence of other cultures with the expansion of films and TVs everything is to be expected.

As usual, Snorts ruins everything. The images of Snortsferatu drunk with his (always) bad hair and ugly lilac sweater are just repugnant… I can not stop thinking, Patrons must love him… what other reason to keep throwing money at those two people…

They are awful…
 
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Thank you @tuffiti ! There’s so much to digest from the Patreon video. The dog got sick in the car. Why would you tell us that ? it’s not even your car ha!
Support squirrel drunk disgusting , fanny running around. Disgusting.
Shrek and his old lady.. Jesus Christ have mercy ..have some dignity. I just cannot stand them. She gets a little attention and gets all arrogant. Not to mention Shrek is the ultimate wannabe. I’m dizzy with disgust!
smiley witch is in her element…. Why would you have an Alice in Wonderland themed party for a bachelorette /bachelor party ?? desperation.
---
@Le Baiseur !!! I finally got your reference. It is epic. I’m a little slow, but I finally got it.
 
Personal note:
I may have to take some time off from here. Watching the Patreon video and having Stephanie do a very close up shot of the Shrek's leaning in to kiss each other after that pitiful "engagement" has put me right off. I had great plans today, and after watching that - the whole video, really - I had to take a lie down.

Thank you @tuffiti for always coming through with the Patreon vlog! And to our lovely @ComtesseRose for starting our new threads without fail!
 
Thank you one and all for the new thread.

We are on a roll after that miserable weird swingers party , Abigail’s Party sprung to mind but even that was more fun.
There was no life, little love and fake laughter.
Sad is that Fanny may have had a reality check and seen what her life has become. Driving all that way to have hot water and some cheap bath salts and supper with people she shares no friendship.
No one wants her and that lilac fairy.

Where was Snorts when Shrek fainted in the bathroom?????
 
Lochness Monster said:
Thank you one and all for the new thread.

We are on a roll after that miserable weird swingers party , Abigail’s Party sprung to mind but even that was more fun.
There was no life, little love and fake laughter.
Sad is that Fanny may have had a reality check and seen what her life has become. Driving all that way to have hot water and some cheap bath salts and supper with people she shares no friendship.
No one wants her and that lilac fairy.

Where was Snorts when Shrek fainted in the bathroom?????
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🧵 Chateau Diaries- no life, little love and fake laughter.

Let's face it you would be embarrassed to be seen in public with that bunch. Charisma bypass Shreks- who want to pretend they're not geeky old frumps, Permasmile who is an evil old cartoon shark, smiling through her too pearly white gnashers. bet her husband has to take a lot when people go home-he probably has to don the gif suit as she whirls round in a blind fury she has a silent temper that one I bet. The other couple are just magnolia and you don't even notice they're there. Then you have Foreskin and Pube my God.- You know that game "who would you have at your perfect dinner party" this would be "who would you invite to the dullest dinner party in history." I would need to do a litre of tequila slammers and mainline drugs to find any of those misfits entertaining- what a sad gaggle of the socially awkward.
 
Thank you @tuffuti for the patreon vlog (it's hit and miss whether I can view it, such are Fanny's terrible admin. & IT skills.)
@ComtesseRose, thank you for the title honour and @Just Grift Wood for the inspiration.

The food the chef prepared for dinner was lovely and it could have been a tasteful evening, but the company let it down. Stephanie, and her entire trivial entourage with their silly, tasteless activities, are all just a farcical waste. Another day of brocunting - how boring - that's all they ever do! What about a hot air balloon tour, picnic in the vineyards, wine tour in antique cars, cycling, boat tour on the Loire, kayaking, pottery, garden painting......

Poor Ed and Candice, whilst you don't seem to be the most exciting folks, I'm sure you're very nice - so please - RUN - it's not too late to stay far away from this motley crew. Your credibility will rise 10 fold if you do.
 
Imperious Me said:
I can't abide being with someone who gets drunk ahead of everyone else... I had a husband who always did that. Snorts is of Uni kid mentality, 'it's free, get it down your neck before it runs out'! Vulgar thing.
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Viv probably served the good stuff, not the fake plonk/box prosecco they decant at the shitoo - not that Snorty would taste the difference.
 
So Stephanie and Philip each chose bubble life; you geniuses called it when finding it strange neither the Shreks nor Philip have friends back home or locally.
But the absolute cosmic nugget for the Tim Burton screenplay is the dinner table full of Truman Burbanks, people who would not exist without video, who don't know and don't care about each other, partly because they're handicapped and party because they're bad, each filming each other at a canned event for the surprise video proposal of two Canadian scammer/swingers who after 20 years still don't get it. That's your movie right there, as another one of you geniuses pointed out, the people you'd rather skip dinner for 20 years than eat with. ETA: They're cannibals, that's what the hair-raising lizard brain vibe at that dinner table is.
The personality disorder vibe and Philip's guzzling someone else's champagne because, as yet another one of you geniuses pointed out, diddums feewings were hurt because we challenged his position as Queen of Porcelain. Maybe that's the night they stayed up all night drunk dialling comments on the chapel electrics video. Diddums is a mean dwunk.
It made me think of this. Which is actually not a ghastly dark Blade Runner satire about the lizard bots who will be running the world, unlike Permacreep's dinner party, but an inclusionary vision of what a utopian intergalactic party would look like. That's a dinner party I'd be honored to attend.


Here endeth my rapporteur's precis of the graduate seminar discussion of one disturbingly dystopian event. Thank you to all who observe and are still human enough to respond.
 
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Imperious Me said:
I can't abide being with someone who gets drunk ahead of everyone else... I had a husband who always did that. Snorts is of Uni kid mentality, 'it's free, get it down your neck before it runs out'! Vulgar thing.
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He‘s just a greedy little fucker whether it’s alcohol or food. Remember how he has 2 puddings when someone else is picking up the tab. Snot faced git.
 
Thanks y’all especially @ComtesseRose & @tuffiti

Lord, at least Vivian’s Husband has a job and she sells things. Do they have a patrion account? I’m not sure. I also give her credit for hiring a caterer having a lovely dinner. It a big change for tit & tat. I wonder if after dinner they said, maybe we should do this for our dinners hahaha nah!!! I never watched Sarah and steve and I’ve only watched Vivian a few times, but I found that Victorian ring intersting. I did notice that Vivian’s dog was put away as it had hurt its leg or something so I hope they keep it away from aggressive Ratso. Was Vivian saying that Sarah‘s gift was the dinnerware or the cups on the table who gives you things like that that’s very strange like on your wedding registry I’d like used dishes please.
I’d also like to say that the only men of snorts age to go shopping with older lady friends are truly well and truly gay boys so if anybody was in doubt that he was gay there we go Vivian does remind me of a lady who does have gay boys as friends. I also have some advice as we know that Philip Reads tattle. I’d advise him to get his mom To buy him some more sweaters this time make it Cashmere and get a whole collection so you could wear different ones every day instead of wearing the same ones over and over and also fill up while you’re at. Bally makes a lovely men’s collection. I think your mom‘s favorite is Solidad and you do have a purse that matches that fabric. I’m wondering if they have a men’s line do you think you can order yourself a new summer wardrobe while she’s on a spending spree for you get it done boy get it done.
 
Just Grift Wood said:
🧵 Chateau Diaries- no life, little love and fake laughter.

Let's face it you would be embarrassed to be seen in public with that bunch. Charisma bypass Shreks- who want to pretend they're not geeky old frumps, Permasmile who is an evil old cartoon shark, smiling through her too pearly white gnashers. bet her husband has to take a lot when people go home-he probably has to don the gif suit as she whirls round in a blind fury she has a silent temper that one I bet. The other couple are just magnolia and you don't even notice they're there. Then you have Foreskin and Pube my God.- You know that game "who would you have at your perfect dinner party" this would be "who would you invite to the dullest dinner party in history." I would need to do a litre of tequila slammers and mainline drugs to find any of those misfits entertaining- what a sad gaggle of the socially awkward.
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Did I spot S and Viv’s daughter in the midst of that excruciating soirée? She’s ghastly, too.

I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Permasmile had a vicious temper and also an acid tongue - I can imagine her verbally eviscerating Steff and the prancing twerp behind their backs. Not for nothing did I call her the Smiling Assassin when she first inveigled her way into SJ’s orbit.

(@ComtesseRose thank you for being chef de mission for the CD Threads!
 
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