Jack Monroe #469 Spam fits my macros.

[Geetbo]

Thread title by ME inspired by a neckbeard.

For my prize i shall have a night with Andi Peters and Gorka off Strictly.

Update - all quite on the Southend Front so we are currently doing Jack as fish. Enjoy x

 

[Country Bumpkin]

First!
ETA: can't remember re: full recap but I know we discussed smelling ferrets, rats, cats, dogs, penguins and flamingos. That's it, that's all I remember. Oh and Jacksy is still MIA

 

[TrolleyParton]

Aaaaggghhhh! I've been lurking on these threats for quite some time but was locked out of my account (long story). I would just like to say, you are all hilarious and Jackanory is a grifting, lying you-know-what. As you were!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Recap-
Jack LEFT twitter in a flounce (not really though) and the ninnies have mithered their way through some greatest hits.
Jack as Fish is now a thing.
Grifty Kitchen is heading down the sales list approaching the 3000thleast popular

 

[bladiesla]

I had forgotten how Jack Monroe gave herself a hard-on by the idea of writing about visiting concentration camps and writing a piece about it (the idea alone, not doing actual work of course), and an even harder hard-on by creating a fantasy about people laughing at her for not having gone to uni

 

[Nonah]

ROBBED!

 

[TheCat'sMother]

There are 2 threads numbered 469 not sure which to use

 

[Jelly Bean]

Use this one dear heart - I'll get mine closed.
Not huffing

 

[Terrible]

There are 2 threads numbered 469 not sure which to use

 

[ChaosCEO]

The Squigs are back to my fave genre of tweet aimed at Jack: “Jack, Morrisons have put the price of Dolmio up by 3p. Help me!”

This one includes the absolutely corking line “No wonder Bootstrap Cook is so busy!”

What does Squig imagine Jack is doing all day? Running from supermarket to supermarket, bursting into the manager’s office and demanding they lower the price of own brand fusilli?

A question to amuse the Frauhaus until Jack emerges from her DRAMATIC PAUSE:

Batman has the Bat Signal to summon him when Gotham is threatened by villainy. What would be the Jack Signal, to summon Jack when a fan notices Baxter’s canned minestrone has risen by 18p?

 

[MavisBeacon]

Jack is still having a DRAMATIC PAUSE from Twitter.

We also mithered about a whole bunch of inconsistencies, flat out lies, and awful showoff person-with-cripplingly-low-self-esteem singing in her appearances at the Greenbelt middle class godfest.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

 

[Foxvint]

Jack trying to be Leggys bit of rough at those dinner parties is objectively very very funny. Oh to have been a fly on the wall at her little My Fair Lady fantasy, dropping her aitches an pissin in the gazpacho

 

[Terrible]

I saw in the giant tv screen in the doctors waiting room this morning

Spoiler

(smear, awful!)

that beloved Asda is scrapping 5,000 night shift jobs and putting workers on lower paid day shifts. Jack‘s probably in the Southend Superbranch sorting it all out.

 

[FlusterCuck]

Coming from the past to say that she stole the peach curry recipe from the first cookery book I ever bought in 1979 - given my age I could easily believe that her mother had the same book - I tried this recipe once, it wasn’t very nice until you removed the peaches then it was ok.

 

[BenignNarcissist]

Just listening to this absolute nonsense... I was hungry and thirsty, were you there? - Greenbelt

"I couldn't write a CV on my computer because I sold it ... I was lonely ... so I started blogging, writing about my life on the internet"

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Is she moonlighting for the Daily Mirror?

That's over fifty seven quid a week. Or, if you take an average of five loads a week, well over a tenner a time. And, of course, there's no source for this claim, never mind the maths involved.

 

[stunrw]

The Squigs are back to my fave genre of tweet aimed at Jack: “Jack, Morrisons have put the price of Dolmio up by 3p. Help me!”

This one includes the absolutely corking line “No wonder Bootstrap Cook is so busy!”

What does Squig imagine Jack is doing all day? Running from supermarket to supermarket, bursting into the manager’s office and demanding they lower the price of own brand fusilli?

A question to amuse the Frauhaus until Jack emerges from her DRAMATIC PAUSE:

Batman has the Bat Signal to summon him when Gotham is threatened by villainy. What would be the Jack Signal, to summon Jack when a fan notices Baxter’s canned minestrone has risen by 18p?

That in light form?

 

[SkippyDoo]

I had forgotten how Jack Monroe gave herself a hard-on by the idea of writing about visiting concentration camps and writing a piece about it (the idea alone, not doing actual work of course), and an even harder hard-on by creating a fantasy about people laughing at her for not having gone to uni

Thinking people are laughing at you for not having gone to uni. So painfully middle class.

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

The Squigs are back to my fave genre of tweet aimed at Jack: “Jack, Morrisons have put the price of Dolmio up by 3p. Help me!”

This one includes the absolutely corking line “No wonder Bootstrap Cook is so busy!”

What does Squig imagine Jack is doing all day? Running from supermarket to supermarket, bursting into the manager’s office and demanding they lower the price of own brand fusilli?

A question to amuse the Frauhaus until Jack emerges from her DRAMATIC PAUSE:

Batman has the Bat Signal to summon him when Gotham is threatened by villainy. What would be the Jack Signal, to summon Jack when a fan notices Baxter’s canned minestrone has risen by 18p?